Recent content by Castava

  1. C

    Married, non practicing poly woman

    He's honest about why he doesn't want me to have other lovers, but I'm not sure about how honest he is, otherwise. It's perfectly true that being monogomous doesn't stop anyone falling in love with someone else. I'm not certain why that doesn't figure into his thinking. Maybe he thinks that...
  2. C

    Married, non practicing poly woman

    When we talk about it, he says he doesn't want to lose me like my ex did. I think he's afraid I will meet someone else who I will come to love more than I love him. And I actually understand that. I'm pretty good about not getting jealous, and I don't mind sharing, at all, but I understand...
  3. C

    Married, non practicing poly woman

    Thanks for the advice. I know my situation is a little odd, but I was hoping it wasn't unique. At this point, I'm used to discarding advice that doesn't apply to my situation, and I do understand that lots of it is just a matter of perspective. I understand because my perspective has changed...
  4. C

    Sense of urgency

    For me, the fact that there's no guarantee a relationship will last makes me want to enjoy it to the fullest while I can.
  5. C

    Sense of urgency

    It really was a matter of me feeling like I knew a relationship could work really quickly. I'm pretty much your generic white American, with no special religious or cultural pressure to commit quickly. It just seems to be something I do.
  6. C

    Why and how did you get into poly?

    I learned about polyamory from online forum. As soon as I read about it, I remembered very nearly kissing a friend of my sister's two years after I married my then husband. Then I remembered the kinds of fantasies I had as a teenager, and how often they drifted into mult-partner territory...
  7. C

    Sense of urgency

    No brilliant thoughts here, but wow, y'all are much more cautious in love than I've ever been. With my first husband, we got engaged after three months of dating. The relationship lasted 18 years. My now husband moved in with my family six weeks after we met. This relationship has lasted 12...
  8. C

    Married, non practicing poly woman

    Forgive me again, I can't seem to stop myself What I have to decide, and what I've had to decide for a while, is what is most important to me right now. It's complicated by the following: I do love my husband, and I have for the last several years. He left his much loved parents, siblings...
  9. C

    Married, non practicing poly woman

    Forgive me for continuing my thought process Since I have to mostly keep my poly tendencies secret, I haven't had the opportunity to work through my position like this before. I admit that I'm mostly doing this for my own sake, although other thoughts would be appreciated. And id be thrilled...
  10. C

    Married, non practicing poly woman

    I'm not really contemplating cheating I know how to resist my sexual and romantic urges ( I'm a romantic idealist by nature, by the way ). What I don't understand is why my husband, who happily participated in a poly relationship for over six years, won't even think about it now. He won't...
  11. C

    Married, non practicing poly woman

    Thanks, kdt26417 and Al99! It's good to be able to discuss what happened, when normally I simply can't.
  12. C

    Sodomy laws

    Likely enough that I know someone who is the daughter of double cousins. From another country. It's freakish to me- her father married a cousin who looks exactly, EXACTLY like his sister. The daughter has a rare genetic disease, too. And, I myself am a productive of several generations of...
  13. C

    Married, non practicing poly woman

    Thanks, Shaya. I'll try to find that book.
  14. C

    Married, non practicing poly woman

    I decided to explore polyamory about 15 years ago, with my then-husband. He admitted to me, after several years of marriage, that he was bisexual, and so we agreed to open up our marriage. Eventually, we became a triad with the man I'm married to now. I think triad is the right word- we were...
Top