Recent content by Confusedspouse

Because I crashed on a friend's couch but that is only good for a couple days. And I have pets to care for.

Sadly, no. I spent a couple days out but that is all I could do.

Thanks. We are currently trying to come to an agreement on splitting stuff. We both have to live at the house til one can afford to move out, so we can't go no contact yet. Trying for peace, mostly.

She actually called my being hurt by things manipulating her to "abandon all her friends," and said I was toxic, and even called me abusive. I never once asked her to abandon anyone. My asks were if we are monogamous, don't be on calls all day with other women every day and to let us time be...

I will be honest. I don't think I will be interested in any relationships in the future. I invested my full trust to have it thrown in my face randomly. I married, shared a life and finances. Now, my financial future is likely ruined due to shared debt that I need to pay alone and my trust is...

So. We are ending in divorce. Thank you all for the advice. She got more sexual in her talk to these people while also insisting monogamy was untouched. I started stepping away from things when hurt and taking an hour to myself to regulate. She started feeling like my hurt was "manipulation"...

She says its understood as "just jokes" between her and them. And she says if she cant joke about being turned on by person Y or about wanting to be tied up by person Z, or wanting person X to "cum", etc then I would be saying she "cant have friends". And called my way of viewing such things...

Well... I guess I am going to get to see if I can handle outside relationships sooner rather than later. She has found a new group and is getting close to four of them. Two are in open relationships. One is in a closed relationship, but literally hates their spouse and kids, and never wants to...

I honestly... am still trying to figure out what in our marriage is real and how she feels. I was totally happy for years, she says she wasnt. She tells me one thing as what she wants, then tells me she was just saying it to please me ages later. Did she always want the deep intimate stuff with...

Her "friend" was a major issue I think in talking about anything. Of course, she was as well, cause I told her *not* to discuss our business with the "friend". But... when I was ignored for weeks, her face was in her phone even during our time together and she was doing "crush grins" to messages...

I kinda gave up on exactly ideal as a teen. I learned a long time ago your typical relationship - monogamous or not - involves the other person wanting porn, flirting with others, "eye candy," etc. Humans are hardwired for the most part to sexual interest in many people. I accepted I am the...

The only gate for it not being in person is her gender dysphoria. She has been on hormones for years, but no surgeries yet and is just starting voice therapy, so she doesn't want to associate much in person with people until she "passes". Right now she wants social events about every other week...

My ideal partner would be honest, spend lots of quality time together, be open, be happy hanging around the house with our dogs. My pipe dream I would find someone like me who is monogamous by nature, not just out of moral choice. I dont find anyone else attractive. I dont get celebrity...

That... isn't an easy question to answer. I have always wanted typical monogamy. That is also how my nature is for myself. How much sharing I can handle I am not sure I can say until / unless I experience the attempt. How do you know where your limits are ?

It is OK. I kinda find the discussion interesting. As for me, I think regardless of how my wife wants to call her relationships- they go beyond typical friendships in a traditional monogamous relationship. She says she doesnt feel like someone is a friend if they arent having long, intimate...