Recent content by dali5671

  1. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    It is not a disproportional amount, so no. It makes sense. TenK, it may take a little longer to reply to your post, but it is a reasonable question/statement.
  2. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    That's exactly what she's saying. And it is a double standard. And I do not see it as an unpardonable offense, I totally get it. How you define primary and secondary is really too vague. She probably spends more time with him. They have sex more than we do. But, as I mentioned earlier, K still...
  3. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    Pol - EE -phobia I hate spelling errors. Thanks for weighing in Bluebird, that definitely makes sense. The finances you mentioned are a tangible aspect of the relationship that ultimately don't concern K. Other money issues simple, just his rent, and now we share a cell phone plan. The more I...
  4. dali5671

    Metamours being Pals?

    Pals, well, maybe..... For some reason when I saw this thread I kinda smiled and instantly wanted to post on it. But, I lay in wait. I needed to read what others were sharing first. We are a poly home, my meta lives with us. As far as personalities, we are polar and exact opposites. I am...
  5. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    K has put plenty in the relationship, in more ways than one. Earlier in this post, someone mentioned dreading the words, "I want to talk about the relationship." That is him. Dahlia has a need to talk about it, she has this never ending curiosity to know how everything works. I know he's...
  6. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    primary vs secondary An issue that has confronted me. As I tried to make the poly ls work for me, the notion I was primary, K secondary was something I leaned on. It only made sense. We were married, spent nearly 20 years together raising our kids, struggling, working, doing what couples do to...
  7. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    beyond the V Me dating I tried the dating. The poly folk we met at the local potluck, all married and dating, suggested OKC. I ran an ad, and had a couple of dates. The online chatting was more fun than the dates, they seemed a bit boring, and overall, a waste of time. I feel like I did it...
  8. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    2 years later So I was having an online discussion with a friend and she referred me to this site to read an article. And rereading my thread from Oct. 2013. My post sounds a little naive as I read it today. I have learned. I'm a little wiser. But that would be the hope for anybody two years...
  9. dali5671

    Swingers?

    Hi LoveBunny. We started out as swingers, and had fun doing it for 17+ years. Eventually, the thing I was attracted to was my wife's interaction with her male partner, and was intrigued by the hotwife scenario, in which I was monogamous and she was free to find FB's, or FWB's at her discretion...
  10. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    poly meetups Our plan is keep the invitation open for the non discussion groups, I think he may enjoy meeting some of the people, but no pushing!!! Easy access all the way. I am impressed by the people in attendance in the groups. OK, I am new to poly so forgive me if this sounds naive, but...
  11. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    Thanks Kevin. Yeah the comment about the drums and moon said loads. Basically I interpreted it as "back off!!" But I have no problems taking about feelings or the relationship if the need arises. Dahlia has a need to talk about it regularly, so the important thing is I am there for her when...
  12. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    OK, thanks SparklePony, I have never really had many guy friends, like I have ONE real friend that was not female, so maybe I am limited in being able to talk freely with him because of that. We have a few common interests, but he not the typical guy, zero interest in beer or sports...
  13. dali5671

    The cure for polphobia

    dream Yes, that's my dream, but I think it will remain a dream. Dagferi is right, but it will never be a triad in my estimation. I'm finished trying to even attempt to communicate with him about the relationship, it's pointless, unnecessary, I'm wasting my time. Things are clicking along fine...
  14. dali5671

    Word Association Game!

    bound
  15. dali5671

    Hard Conversation With Hubby

    I keep the idea/fantasy in the back of my mind. Part of me thinks it is scorchingly hot.
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