Recent content by Kaycee

  1. K

    One partner decides, the other makes a choice

    All or nothing is my effort. I give all of my heart in relationships. I give my all with work, friendships, living my best life. My submission includes time spent away from him. Curfew, bedtime, who I go out with, the extent of friendships with males, at this point it's extending to career...
  2. K

    My situation that I struggle with

    I'm so sorry. I wish I had some wisdom to offer. I'm hoping for a positive outcome for you.
  3. K

    One partner decides, the other makes a choice

    Galagirl, thank you again for your input. It's the hard questions I need to answer up to. There's no point in just bitching if I'm not going to make a positive change. I don't feel safe and it is a merry go round. My fear is that asking him now if he's completely done and means it would be like...
  4. K

    One partner decides, the other makes a choice

    Yes. He acknowledged he fucked up. If He had been open from the beginning, things would be better between he and I. The action behind his words is what I have to hold on to right now. That's also part of the problem. I feel it's my fault he broke up with her. I didn't ask that, and wouldn't ask...
  5. K

    One partner decides, the other makes a choice

    Thank you for that. You worded what I meant to say much better. When I initially met his partners, I wanted to know their boundaries to make sure I didn't overstep any of them. This being my first poly relationship, I want to do it well. An example is the first meeting. I wasn't affectionate...
  6. K

    One partner decides, the other makes a choice

    I over edited my signature. I also wasn't clear in my role. This is my first D/s and poly, so I've learned everything by reading books and blogs and going to poly meet ups. He hasn't read the books yet, I have hope that will help. There was no actual negotiated poly when I came into the...
  7. K

    One partner decides, the other makes a choice

    As it stands right now, they aren't together. It wouldn't be unreasonable to be concerned he's just hiding the relationship or stringing her along. I haven't regained the trust I once had. Everything did happen much too quickly after their breakup. I acted out of emotion. If He decided to...
  8. K

    One partner decides, the other makes a choice

    Thank you all for your responses! Ravenscroft, it does seem that I've painted him as weak and whiny. That gives me something to think about. I don't hold himy blameless, I don't put all the blame on Carrot either. Thank you Galagirl, I'm sticking with your names. I blame myself for not seeing...
  9. K

    One partner decides, the other makes a choice

    Please be patient, new to forums and all! M- My only partner, lives with A, primary and B, secondary. We are egalitarian, just use those terms. I'm tertiary. Here's the issue, I apologize if I missed anything while searching by the way. Around the time I met M and got involved, he had split...
  10. K

    Preventing triangulation

    I'm treading as carefully as I can. I have read, and bought for Him and them, Power Circuits, More than two, Opening up, Ethical Slut and the Jealousy workbook. I actually went to a talk with Primary and we both hope to keep going. I go to poly meet ups too. A good relationship with my metas...
  11. K

    Gaslit?

    When I have had to end relationships I keep it short and simple. My needs aren't being met, I'm not happy, it's time for me to move on. Things like that. Then NC. I was with a narcissist once myself. It took years to escape. Not everyone can end relationships amicably. There doesn't have to be...
  12. K

    Preventing triangulation

    I agree He's got a lot of learning to do. I'm struggling with my Service right now for a lot of reasons. I'm not sure if it's because they don't have D/s relationships or because He doesn't want to hear any bitching, the way He mismanages His secondary anyway. I want to be good at poly. I want...
  13. K

    Preventing triangulation

    Thank you for the replies. I'm not so great with forums/names/ IDs for everyone, I will fix it for clarification for future posts. I realize that most of the issue is with the hinge. I bought the books for Him, He just hasn't read them yet. I hope He does soon. I don't want to take every...
  14. K

    Preventing triangulation

    I have been with my partner for almost 11 months. He and his primary for 5 years, His secondary for 3. They have lived together for 2. I've recently been communicating with His secondary about some issues she has. One being social media and my presence on those platforms. When I post and M sees...
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