Recent content by paraselene

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    For Monos: when/what quelled your fears of your poly partner leaving you?

    I'm definitely mono, and I had my first open relationship with someone who swept me off my feet and said all the right things about non-monogamy, but then betrayed my trust at every turn while gaslighting me about how I needed to work on my insecurities. He eventually got someone else pregnant...
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    YouAreHere is... where? (Or, "This Road Map Still Sucks...") - Blog, Part II

    So happy to have found this thread! As a presumed mono suddenly and unexpectedly contemplating the prospect of being the hinge in a V, I'll be following with great interest.
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    presumed mono maybe finally making a shift to poly?

    Oh, indeed, this looks very interesting. Thanks for the tip.
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    presumed mono maybe finally making a shift to poly?

    I met my non-monogamous partner five years ago and chose to date him despite being freaked out by the concept of polyamory, which was brand new to me at the time. I've spent those five years coming to terms with his active dating life, learning to look to my own needs, cultivating platonic...
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    Mono in poly relationship - should I try dating others?

    Just to clarify, he did not insist that I start dating. I was referring to his repeated reassurances that he would be fine with my doing so and would be happy if I found that I enjoyed it. He has never, ever asked me to violate any of my own boundaries and has stated clearly that I should never...
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    Mono in poly relationship - should I try dating others?

    Thanks, MeeraReed, for your thoughts on going outside the dating comfort zone. My partner insists that he'd like me to date others, but I do doubt my own capacity to be emotionally/romantically attached to someone else without diminishing my love for him. For my entire dating life, I've loved...
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    Mono in poly relationship - should I try dating others?

    Hi, Redpepper, and thanks for your insights. I've read quite a few of Mono's posts with great interest. My partner does know that I'm considering dating and is encouraging me to do so. I do have some concerns that he'd like me to be non-monogamous because it will validate his own polyamory in...
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    Mono in poly relationship - should I try dating others?

    Stevenjaguar and SkylerSquirrel: I hear you, but given that being in love with one person seems to make me blind to other potential lovers, I think I may need to go a little bit outside my comfort zone here, or else I could be waiting for years to find out if having multiple intimate/sexual...
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    Mono in poly relationship - should I try dating others?

    Hi, everybody. This is my first time posting here, though I've been reading for several months. I'm glad to have found such a supportive community. I'm a mid-40s woman, previously monogamous and content that way, now in a happy relationship with a poly man, R. R told me on our first date that...
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