Recent content by PolyLinguist

Hello Polynew. Why not you indeed. There isn't much about you in your profile, so maybe you would like to elaborate a bit on what kinds of things you like, what your major interests are, and what you might be looking for in a poly relationship. I myself live in Vancouver. You can find my age...

I quite agree on the first part. Indeed, we are all lonely at times. It is not even a bad thing. I am solidly married, but at times have travelled alone for business and other reasons, and there is a special bittersweet feeling to spend some time on my own, in a foreign place, with no-one to...

Okay, okay, let's lower the tone. I am sorry if I offended anyone. I agree that I made assumptions I shouldn't have. It is clear that non-hierarchical polyamory is not for me. It simply couldn't work unless I downgraded my present relationships (not only with my wife, but also with my...

If she is not poly, and does not want to "suffer" from time-sharing issues, why did she enter a relationship with someone already attached? Oh, I get it, it was love and she couldn't help it. [sarcasm] You know, it's not as if such things haven't happened to me. I was once desperately in love...

As usual, I have a different take on things. The problem, in my view, is not being poly, or not being good at time management. It is the unfortunate tendency to base everything on momentary feelings, on the lack of willingness to make one's priorities clear, and on catering to every whim of...

Ha! We would have a lot of fun arguing these things out, if we didn't draw blood first. A mistress, in traditional terms is a female partner of a man he is not married to (or equivalent to marriage, these days), and to whose living expenses he contributes in a significant way. There must be a...

Your reply is great for me, for it allows me some insight into the kinds of domestic arrangements that poly people have. Obviously there are other kinds of domestic arrangements too, but people rarely seem to speak about such mundane things. Now, someone moving into my household as a third...

Which is why it's so interesting, and so important for me, to be on this board. I get to discover lives very different from mine. I come from a long line of "couple-oriented" people, this is how my marriage has turned out to be as well, and this is how most of my friends (and virtually all my...

It makes a lot of sense, thanks. As for the inevitability of hierarchical situations, in my opinion they are almost certain to happen if one of the participants in a new polyamorous relationship already has a long-standing relationship with someone else. Pretty much the only way to make it...

Thank you, nycindie, and I am sorry if I misinterpreted you. It can happen to the best of us... (Not that I am among the best, I am sure). In fact, I can see another aspect of why this attitude can be irritating. Suppose I was interested in someone (in the poly world, obviously), and that...

Interesting discussion. Thanks to AggieSez for starting it. I learned more about peoples’ attitudes to married people getting into polyamory than from any other source I have seen. Still, I have questions and comments about some concepts raised: The concept of harm, as in: Harmful to whom...

I like surveys of this kind. Let me try to answer the questions, as honestly and clearly as I can: Most certainly. Anyone part of a couple who wants to take on a poly relationship without believing that such privileges exist will be un-coupled in short order. As for defining it, it is easy...

Thank you WhatHappened for your kind words, and for not misinterpreting what I am trying to say. And you clearly understand what marriage is about, even if we take out the absolute fidelity provisions from it.

And where exactly did I say that this is what I think most people want? I never said that - I said that in this particular case, which I used as an example, talking about it would not have had any beneficial effects. Beneficial for whom? For me? No, I didn't feel the need to talk, I can be quite...

I don't quite agree. In my experience, friendships are easy-going relationships whose expectations need no discussion. If I live in the same city as a friend, we get in touch with each other once or twice a month, we get together for coffee or a meal, we go for a walk, we talk. If I am in...