Recent content by Seeker77

That's not evidence, Dagferi. That's anecdotal, not necessarily pertaining to the OP's situation at all. Perhaps it was the way you phrased it. Why not something more like, "Be careful and go slow. I've seen a lot of people attempt triads, and here's some of the bad things that have happened...

I understand that, but the OP had done some research before posting and was looking for some perspective on the positive side of creating a triad. You started off by questioning the motives of the potential gf, without a shred of evidence to go by.

bt43: Have you, your wife, and potential gf all read "Opening Up" by Tristian Taormino? If not, I suggest you do and discuss it all together. It may give you some idea about the pitfalls you can avoid. Best of luck.

No offense, Dagferi, but I think your reply was incredibly narrow-minded. People seek out all kinds of relationships for all kinds of reasons. I don't believe it's our place to judge (as long as everyone involved is honest, consenting, and adult.)

Timing continues to be an issue I need to deal with. My wife and I are both fairly busy, so we get about two hours a day to spend together. Normally, that's enough, but I feel bad using that time to discuss my poly issues, so I lock it away for a while. A couple days, a week -- as long as I can...

I think you need to unpack this. As long as you're acting honestly and respectfully with all parties involved, what would you be doing "wrong?" From my point of view, I don't want to date with my wife because of a fear that I'm somehow acting badly, or cheating, but because I share everything...

This resonated with me, as I feel the same way. Yes, I could find love separate from my wife, I don't want to. But I hear what Ariakas is saying. It's probably a tougher road trying to date as a couple.

Thanks, Musical. I agree.

We haven't talked much about poly the past couple days, except that I thanked my wife for agreeing to my "thought experiment." I told her how much better I felt for taking such a big step. I don't think either of us knows what comes next, except just getting closer and being attentive. Then...

IMO, sex is just like any other part of a relationship -- it requires attention and nurturing from everyone involved. No one, not even the most dominant person, wants to be the one to initiate sex every single time, year after year. So how do you initiate sex with your husband? Do you tease...

Hi wildflowers! Thank you very much. I think your suggestion is great. I definitely don't want to pigeonhole any one or any relationship into a predetermined box. I have no idea what will happen in the future, so I'm trying to keep my mind (and heart) open to possibilities. That's one thing...

Welcome, LadyManda. I'm new here too. There's a lot to read, a lot to learn, but I'm so glad I found this site. I hope you find what you're looking for.

My wife and I talked a couple nights ago. I started off on a bad foot by beginning the conversation pretty late in the evening as we were getting ready for bed. (Note to self: start these talks earlier when we're both in better head-space to deal with heavy emotions.) I began with a simple...

Thanks, Garriguette.

Garriguette: Hello! To answer your question: no, I don't have any reason not to believe her, except that she's never been exposed to polyamory. (Sure, I had a tiny hope at the onset that she would be more receptive to it....) But either way, I fully accept who she is. I'm not out to change...