Recent content by tamlvscarl

The thread looking for someone was old, not new. And my partner was updating it, looking at it, not me. He doesn't know I posted this thread.

Dagferi, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply that you don't get jealous. I think I meant maybe you were better at dealing with those feelings and looking inward. YouAreHere, thank you for your feedback as a mono, and how you deal with it all. I am working on it. That's why I'm here. Obviously, I...

I think you don't do those things (sit at home worrying about him making all sorts of special intimate memories, etc.) because you operate/identify as poly. It is different for someone who is basically mono trying to digest jealousy, in my opinion.

Yes, I guess... no, I know you are right. I don't have to be/do/want everything my partner wants in life, but I still try to be. I am still coming to terms with the fact that I can't be/do/want all the same things he does.

I would love to give him what he wants-- a second person for him to love and share things with (love, fun, happiness, intimacy, etc.), without it making me feel jealous/confused/a yo-yo of feelings. That is why I come on these boards, to read about other people's struggles and how they overcame...

I am okay with alone time. I have friends, family, hobbies, and even just my own down time, which I like.

Thank you, Vicarious. That is essentially how I feel. And like I said earlier in this thread, it was becoming easier after he had been dating someone else for 3 years. They broke up in May, and it's been just us again. I started getting used to the old us, just me and him. I have to get used to...

Hi all. Thank you Kevin and Vicarious for putting things into words better than I may have so far. Yes, ideally, we would be able to build a relationship where all three are enjoying new things together, and no, not always at the same time. My husband and I are still very much in love and do...

Exactly...it isn't that easy to just pick one. I could say sure of course I pick #3 but a lot comes with it.

No definitely not depressed! But thanks for your concern. :) For the most part, I am usually ok with it, and I guess you could say have grown used to it. I just struggle with it from time to time. He does meet my needs. Some of my wants, he cannot meet, because that would mean him not being who...

That was a great article, thanks!

Sorry it took me a few days to respond. To answer some of your questions, no, my husband doesn't leave me to suffer in poly hell alone. He does try to reassure me constantly. I have a hard time not being everything to him. And yes, I know I can't possibly, but it hurts and feels bad when it...

It isn't that easy. Yes, obviously I want him in my life. That's why I am still here after struggling constantly with this. It does not make it any easier when he is out meeting new people, having firsts all over again, making new memories, while I am left out. It is easy for two poly people to...

Thank you all for your feedback and honest opinions and advice. I don't know what I am going to do at this point... Talk to my husband, of course, and try to see where we go from here. Again thank you all for being a listening ear. :)

After 19 years together, and him first saying, "No, it's just sex," ok, I bent. "No, it's this or that," I bent. Then finally him saying, "I want 2 of you, two primaries," two lives split down the middle, still I bent, until she walked away. And now it's him looking for that other person, while...