Recent content by wildflowers

Re: there is no cure for BPD It may not be a cure per se, but DBT has been shown to be very effective for a significant portion of people with BPD; it was developed specifically for working with them. I'd strongly suggest you/your met amour investigate that approach.

I think she did what you asked - saw you and was cordial - and then you changed the rules and inserted yourself more into her space (FB). She doesn't want to interact, doesn't see you as a friend, and has been pretty clear about it; I think you could have predicted your post wouldn't make her...

:) I liked the comment about how people in comedy are more free to bring up challenging issues. I also liked the techie slant.

I agree with GreenAcres; #2 and #3 will make things worse. I wonder a bit about #1 as well. Instead of talking ABOUT sex and intimacy, could you maybe strive to talk WITH intimacy? Talk about things that are important to you, built comfort, safety, a feeling of being loved and heard? That seems...

Glad to hear the new grand baby arrived safely is doing so well! Toddlers are exhausting; no doubt. I don't want to go back to that stage either. Hang in there!

Good luck with the EMG!

I am comfortable being secondary to my BF because he is also secondary to me, in the practical sense of how much our lives are intertwined. Neither of us has a huge amount of time to offer outside of other life/relationship/ family, so we are matched in what we can offer- in a logistical rather...

Sorry to hear the situation has progressed to this. I know you worked really hard at trying to make things work. More hugs.

Sorry you're having such a rough time, Bassman. It's a tough transition for sure. Are you sure the regular contact is not making it harder for you? I know a bunch of people here are helped by a period of no contact. Hope you can get some more rest and peace soon. Hugs.

I haven't started cooking for Thanksgiving yet, and you have a tree ad wrapped gifts!!! Yikes!

Sorry to hear that you're having a tough time. I've struggled with feeling unimportant at times; I think I understand how you feel at risk. And those feelings can be very powerful when anxiety gets triggered; sounds like you're doing a good job at reminding yourself that your perception may...

I wondered what was happening with you. Glad to here things are going well!

Is it possible that David was cheating on someone else/just having a fling, and then changed his mind? Thats how it reads to me. What did he say he was looking for, and how did he describe his situation? It doesn't sound to me like you spoiled everything; it sounds more like you got involved...

What if you don't put any interpretation on his request? Maybe he's avoiding, maybe he's not, but maybe it doesn't matter. Could you make poly work for you within his constraints? Given your busyness and your liking for family events, I can see that perhaps not. You might also feel that were...

Sorry you're feeling so down about yourself right now, kevin. I too believe you help a lot of people here, and hope that provides some comfort. And I hope this phase passes quickly!