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I would accept the gift. Yes, you are in a relationship with them, but you are also providing valuable services so they can work. A used car for YOU seems only fair under the circumstances. Clearly they value you and your contribution, so gracefully accept this and appreciate their fairness and...

I suggest you print out the articles and such listed above, read them carefully and think about them. Then give copies to the couple to read and discuss between themselves, and then ask to discuss the ideas in detail, having them explain how their thinking matches with the ideas in the articles...

Welcome! I'm sure Kevin will be along shortly to greet you properly ... Poly requires very good communication. It's very difficult to cover all possible scenarios in advance, though (if you can even anticipate what may arise), so there will be some surprises and issues, as you've discovered...

Approaching things theoretically is one thing, but when it comes down to living it, our issues get in the way. Sometimes, time and experience teach us to overcome the insecurities, or find a way to live with them in some way that works for all involved. I think the key element is for all...

I agree. There is, however, a finite amount of time, and it can get complicated deciding how and with whom to spend it. I have a primary relationship that fills most of my time, and a secondary that involves a small amount (she has other relationships so this works well for us). For me and my...

Perhaps a thought experiment will help put things in perspective. Suppose you were dating another woman, and had a child with her despite your gf wanting one with your first. (We can assume you agreed because soon this other woman will be too old to have children. And maybe you have NRE with...

Frankly, I suspect that if she has his child first, you won't have a chance to have your own with her. It sounds like they have a greater connection and better sex life than you do with her. She is making a DNA argument in his favor (he would find it difficult being forty or older when his child...

For him, this is new and exciting. Eventually, I think he'll calm down and pursue his options more carefully and thoughtfully - but there will probably be some mistakes along the way. For now, I suggest you schedule a brief time each day or every other day to discuss any new contacts or...

Personally, I find it unethical and unacceptable to date someone who is in a relationship, without them having agreed with their SO that this is permissible in their relationship. I dislike cheating and refuse to participate in helping someone else cheat. It does not sound like your husband is...

Swinging is a huge step for many couples - any kind of non-monogamy is hard or threatening for most. Polyamory is an even bigger step, and one he's not at all used to and probably hasn't really thought about. It's quite normal and natural for him to be feeling as he does at this point. There's...

Keep in mind that since they're long distance, the texting they do is romancing her mind which is the most important sex organ. You are there physically, but what are you doing to focus her erotic thinking on you as well?

I'm sure you're right, but I don't know any unicorn hunters so can't speak from experience.

My perspective is that a "unicorn" can become a fully equal partner - if they want to, and over time (sexually, emotionally, financially, etc.). We built our relationship over time and experiences, and someone new coming into our relationship has to build that trust and privilege through new...

I've had a straight female FWB for the past three years that is slowly moving towards a more poly relationship as a V. (She is much younger, but that really has no bearing on our relationship - she is well employed and picked me.) She and my wife became good friends, but are not sexually...

For the past few years I've had a FWB that has slowly become poly to a small degree. She first acknowledged the shift recently, and we both think it will build with time. We've usually only gotten together about once every two weeks, and that is likely to continue with occasional variations more...

You may not be able to get the horse back in the barn, as they say. Your wife already has another relationship, and may not be willing to give it up or cut it back to suit your preferences (and if she tries, she may must be hiding her feelings about this other woman from you to avoid the...

When you opened things up for her to explore her bi side, you opened two doors, because she's bi. Of course, you probably only expected her to pursue the side of her sexuality she does not have with you. Since she's gone beyond that, you have the right to explore relationships with other women...

Perhaps swinging is like poly kindergarten. You get to explore and discover some issues - and hopefully deal with them - without having them disrupt a more meaningful and significant (i.e., poly) relationship.

I suppose that entering into a poly relationship could reveal relationships areas needing work and growth, particularly involving jealousy, possessiveness, control, and acceptance. We did not experience many of these concerns in our first poly relationship, as for some reason it was quite easy...

If the four of you are not having sex with anyone else, then if your partner's g/f and her b/f are tested and free of STDs, then condoms should not be necessary. If everyone also agrees to tell the others if they have or expect to add another partner, then precautions can be taken as deemed...