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Thank you lunabunny! I've been trying to do the 'simple' smaller scale things and I am proud of those. I am proud of the friendships I've developed. I have many friends - people who have proven themselves to be willing to do things when I need help (of course, I try to be that kind of friend...

Polyamory hasn’t existed throughout the ages. Non-monogamy definitely has been around in various forms for millennia. But polyamory specifically is a relatively new historical development, only a few decades old. Maybe skip the history part and focus on other aspects?

Very true. It's unpleasant at best. But I have never called someone a 'fat bitch', 'full of diseases', 'ugly', 'no one wants you anyway' when being dumped. Ever. I've gotten all of those and more just for declining an online invitation. (And only from men. Women have treated me poorly but not...

And that’s why I recommend no detailed explanation, no discussion, and no further communication (whenever no contact is possible). This strategy doesn’t prevent people from reacting badly but it can prevent you from seeing their reactions. This kind of behavior in response to rejection...

'I've really enjoyed chatting with you. But I've got life circumstances that make continuing chatting with you not the best option for me. This is entirely about my life circumstances - you have done nothing wrong. You deserve someone who can give you time and attention. I wish you the best.'...

Starbucks iced chai latte

I'm not sure Kevin. Part of it is let down after moving. My old place is up for sale - finally! I'm winding down from that. TinyDog is howling whenever I leave the apartment. I'm so worried about my neighbor's reactions. So far they've been really kind and patient but I am really wound up about...

kizmet74, I have to agree that this particular woman seems to be bad news with all sorts of warning red flags. Are you and your husband only seeking a man and woman to be in a closed quad with you both? Or is that a preference but not the only relationship configuration you'd be interested...

Excalibur626, I'm going to move this thread to the General Poly Discussion area. The Dating & Friendships area is really for possibly connecting with potential dates or friends. It's not really meant to be a place to ask for advice. (P.S. There really isn't a way you could have known that...

That's scary lunabunny. I'm pulling for Boho and you.

Ugh, I’m falling into depression.

I don't like using the word seeking a tribe or wanting to be part of a tribe. Yes, I want to be part of a community. And I belong to several. And tribe is very popular nowadays as a stand in for a sense of belonging to a community. But, historically, being in a tribe has usually meant being...

Death cult Unrelated to poly thought: I've come to the conclusion that Christianity in the US has become a death cult. I firmly believe that too many Christians are doing all they can to hasten the end of civilization and possibly life on earth. All so they can go to some heavenly reward...

You have more options than either a separation/divorce and an open marriage. You two can choose to transition to a companionate marriage where sex between you two is over but you continue to be partners in caring for children and each other. This option does not require legal divorce. Neither of...

Actually we are all dogs. Woof. Kevin, however, is a cat.

You know whose opinion really matters here? Your wife’s sister. And while being honest is good, all this pre-game planning borders on the creepy. Do NOT proposition her while she lives with you or is in any way dependent on you. She cannot give a full and clear consent in that situation...

Thanks Tinwen! I did just that when TinyDog moved in and I realized he was struggling. My neighbors have been very kind and understanding. I hope I am not trying their patience too much. But now I have cameras in the apartment to see exactly how long and what triggers my dog’s barking. I...

Never said science is bunk. It can be helpful in many contexts. But regarding human behavior, it is too often used as a crutch to prop up existing social norms. Very little of human behavior is ‘natural’ in how people tend to use it - as an innate constant that doesn’t change over time or in...

There is nothing going on the poly front. I am halfheartedly paying attention to OKC but the people who message me don't interest me and the people I occasionally message don't respond. OKC feels like a waste of time again. I've deactivated my account again. I am slowly unpacking and getting my...

*slow claps for AutumnLeaves* You said what I was getting around to write. All of these 'scientific' theories are put put there to 'explain' the way people think men and women should be. And they are all bunk. There is no science, no 'natural' way of being a man or a woman. We are social...