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My ex-wife has bought a house down the street from me. She moves in soon with her gf and is all a-buzz with happiness and excitement. It's been a long journey for her to achieve this goal. I am so happy for her. I am concerned, however, that our strong bond and connection will be a barrier to...

I haven't been able to write for some time here because, frankly, I am just tired. I come home to my empty house and sleep every day after work and still wake up tired after my naps. I wake up in the morning tired and go to bed tired. Still I carry on and fight it every day. I am hoping that the...

I have been processing the men I now have in my life. I have drawn some men in that are similarly needy and cowardly, as Mono was. They don't face the truth about their lives and continue to believe that they are in a position where they should benefit from the privileges they have been given...

So, other stuff going on: I wrote on here long ago about a friend of mine that I helped through a big break-up. He became close to me and I to him as a result. We have remained friends for years now and he recently got married to a woman he adores and respects. He no longer identifies as poly...

Hey folks. I continue to be grateful for your kind replies and concerns. I keep writing here because it is helping me heal and I believe that to be open and honest about my journey helps others in some way. Not everyone gets what I am going through, nor do they agree with the path I take, but I...

Hey everyone. I do facilitate a secret FB group. (Thanks, NYCindie. :)) So far, it has been a sane and peaceful group that is enjoyed by many members here. Usually people post articles they have read and want to share, dilemmas and details about their lives, or they ask questions and ponder poly...

You know what hurts the most right now? He used to rely, and I thought he still was relying on me, to dig him up from the side of him that he considered bad. I was his life love and anchor. It turns out that he wasn't talking to me when I thought he needed space to process, because he was...

post #1991, 4th sentence in, I was not love boomed, I was love bombed! Gah! Can't edit. Other edits too. Bugs.

Thanks for this. You are not the only one that has told me in hindsight that they didn't trust him and that there was something about him they were creeped out by. I can see that now and understand what that is. I have it too. How can the woman that is with him NOT have that feeling, especially...

I am concerned at the moment about Christmas, as it's a time of year that puts me over the edge, anyway. PN is transitioning and going off in another direction in life. He hasn't changed pronouns yet, nor has he told his family or our boy, LB. His life-change from male to female explains a lot...

There have only been two times that the people around me disagreed with my assessment of the final tally and thesis on my relationship with Mono. Once was when I was with some friends and one of them asked about him, I told them a brief bit of history and the result of our break-up. They...

I think poly will work great for me in this simmered-down or watered-down version of love I feel for any possible partner who is worth my time and effort. The love I had for Mono was intense and consuming. He groomed me well to play the part of the front lady to his lies. His skills at...

This was very helpful to read. That is, in part, what happened, until love was just a word and sex was just an action for him, it seems. He didn't know what love was, and it was lost in terms of his love for me, if he ever really had any. Now he believes that moving on to someone else will...

Thanks for writing newtoday. My heart goes out to you. I forgot to mention that PN is transitioning, M to F. Another change is afoot.

I came here to read and re-group. I am not grieving as much, but instead watching my family and close friends grieve now. I am finding that it has been easier than I expected to get through the lies that made up my life. Funny how if something is blatantly obvious and finally all is revealed, in...

I sat in my backyard yesterday afternoon on a bench under the apple tree and reminded myself of the last time I sat there. The sun is now low in the sky and the tomato plants are fading into dust. The apples on the tree and a few scattered red leaves on the ground seemed cold in the sun. The...

Point taken. As it is now, I am taking a lot of time for myself, and looking closely at who is around me. I am dating the one man and being really direct about how close in our connection we we can get, as it's too soon. He is respecting my need to keep space and perspective and I appreciate...

Wow, I said that, huh? haha! Thanks for the reminder. It's weird to reread that. I'm not sure what you are relating the quote to, however. Would you say more about that, please?

I talked to one guy I have dated all summer (the one with the addiction issues) and he was cool with me dating others. I told him that actually I was putting him on hold for the time being, as I wanted to see what would happen with the other guy. He wasn't surprised and told me he didn't love me...

I've been grief dating... and it's caught up with me. There is a guy I have been seeing since Mono left. I had a surge of dating the day after I kicked him out. I met a man and I have been seeing him all summer. Nothing serious, but company, somewhere to go when I'm lonely, if he will have me...