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Honeypie didn't come next..."you're selfish and all you think about is yourself" is what came next and "all you're doing is hurting the people around you" and " I only want to come to the counselling so you don't make me out to be the bad guy"

Thank you for all your responses. Especially GG and Mags, you two are so different but I appreciate both your POVs. I'm feeling confused. He DOES want to come to counselling. He said he'll do anything to make our marriage work (??) and I said there's no point as he's made his ultimatum so...

Same here! But my husband doesn't see it that way at all. I should have eyes for him and him alone. Unfortunately it's just not the way I work. And I've tried and tried.

Some links for you if you haven't come across them yet... Mixed Marriages - Couples in Conflict: When the Polyamory vs. Monogamy Debate Strikes Close to Home http://www.lovewithoutlimits.com/articles/Polyamory_vs_Monogamy.html A dialog between a polyamorous and a monogamous person...

Hi there, I am in exactly the same position as you except I am the wife. My husband didn't take it well either. If you want to read my whole story, it's all in the 'General' section of the forum on a thread called 'How do I even start to explain?' Not sure if it'll help you much but at least...

I'm so glad I have this place to come to through all of this. Thank you to each of you. I'm going to go see the counsellor we were seeing by myself hopefully. Just so that I can talk all of this out. Make sure I'm not being completely ridiculous you know?

"Work on the marriage" means to him, have a 'marriage MOT' (another car analogy, MOT is the tests they do here to make sure a car is roadworthy) to see how our marriage is doing and where we can improve. With a Christian counsellor who would have no idea what I'm going through spiritually or...

Already happened. Several times. The fact of the matter is, I'm not the same person he married. I've changed a lot, in a short space of time really. And he's freaking out and refusing to be any kind of flexible.

No I'm pretty sure he doesn't want to hear anything about polyamory or my feelings for others or my bisexuality and attraction to women... He doesn't want to hear anything about how I believe in a collective consciousness and the fact that we're all energy instead of how I used to think we...

He's just told me he doesn't see the point of going back to the counsellor. He wants to work on our marriage and has found a (Christian) marriage counsellor but he has told me I need to decide between him or polyamory as he will never have an 'open marriage' with me.

Ignorance and fear drive me to find the "fine" feeling. I don't do well with change or with conflict. So I guess I'm just seeing him respond positively to me because he thinks he's 'won' and it makes me feel better. Bit messed up really. I'm working on the fear. This isn't state provided, I'm...

Awwh that's a shame!! Hahaha

We view the internet quite differently I think, my husband and I. He thinks my online friendships are fairly meaningless. A harmonious life sounds great, it's what I will visualise.

Yes I've found the articles on the More Than Two website about polyamory for monogamists so maybe that would be helpful for him. I don't know, we'll have to see. Next appt isn't til the 16th.

The counsellor is fantastic. I feel very comfortable with her which is great. It went...ok. It was more her trying to get to know us and get an idea of what's going on. As far as I can tell, everything is fine between my husband and I, we love each other very much but he is upset and angry with...

I'll gladly design it, pick the colours and layout. But I don't get involved in the 'doing' haha

Welcome back!! Sorry it's taken me a while to reply, I have a lot on my mind right now. What do I like doing? Mostly I love to sing. It's my most favourite thing in the world! And second to that would be gaming haha. I'm a bit of a geek. I love movies too. I'm sure there are others things...

Everyone comes with their opinion from a different view point, a different life story, different experiences. You just need to read responses to your question with an open mind, you came for responses right? They won't always be what you want to hear. But at the same time, you don't always have...

Thanks everyone. First counselling session tonight...

Hi River, I'm guessing this ties in with the comment you made on the thread I started regarding emotional affairs. And to be perfectly honest, I don't know. I think the social world is changing in a way (in some places!) and the lines are becoming blurred. I do wonder if polyamory will become a...