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So my over arching question to this post was should I trust my metamour? I think I'm back full circle again to this question. I feel like she would prefer me to just disappear and I can tell you that I have definitely wished she would disappear on occasion. It was never this difficult with...

I second that. You don't trust him and he doesn't respect you. Don't waste any more of your precious time. Walk away!

All noses welcome! Yes, I absolutely believe that his ability to make babies is a validation of his manhood. Maybe he does secretly hope he'll get her pregnant, I don't know. ARGH, worrying about the what if is driving me crazy and I certainly don't want to turn this into a self fulfilling...

He has never said he wants more kids, so I would be surprised if that were true. Can I live with it? I love kids and to be honest, there are moments where I think we should have another one. The moment comes to a crashing halt when I remember that I am 43 and how much money a baby costs. I...

A. We have all been tested. I am mono and so is his gf, so unless he introduces another girl in the mix, we're safe STD wise. B. I have said that I could not handle it and would end the marriage. This is not meant to be a threat but a true reflection of how I think I would react. Of course...

That assessment is spot on. He has said that he doesn't want more kids for the reasons I've given previously, but wouldn't be unhappy if he impregnated either of us. I asked him if he was banking on me eventually coming to terms with it if it happened. He really didn't give an answer, but I...

Thanks for sharing your story. I did bring up the vasectomy option last night and this morning. It's going to take a lot of convincing, if I really want to push for it. His reasons are similar to your ex-h. We are not fanatics, but we try to maintain a natural balance. We rarely take medicine...

It is not that either of us feel his gf is not worthy of having his child. I will give you both his reasons (as I understand them) and my own reasons: HIS - He has 2 children from a prior marriage who are 23 and 17. He has one child with me who is 5. The expense of another child is not...

This would be a solution I would be happy with, but I fear it might take some convincing. Yes, she told me that. I think she was just being playful, but I don't know her that well, so I'm not certain. This is also why I'm not sure if my suspicions are warranted or I'm being paranoid. Well...

I find myself once again needing advice. My hubby is about 3 months into a new relationship, they're still in NRE but have reached the "love" stage. I really don't have many boundaries, I let them do their thing in our house and I don't limit the number of days/hours/overnights they share. But...

Hi Lovewithus, Let me first say, I get you. I am mono, but my man of 10 years is more fulfilled by more than one person in his life. It was very hard for me in the beginning as I wondered what I could do differently to be his everything. It took a lot of communication, sole searching and...

Update - My hubby did come home that night at about 11 pm. He understood that I would have preferred he let us know proactively that he would be later than expected rather than having to sit and wonder. It was obvious that he had an amazing day and I did not want to harp on the issue and kill...

I think that is probably true. I have considered filling our time apart with a friend of my own, but really don't have the desire. Thanks for the link, it was very helpful and the advice to do nice things for myself is exactly what I need. Great advice and something that I try to do however...

I wish I had words of wisdom for you, but I don't. However, I just wanted to say I know exactly how you feel. I'm not sure if you feel the same, but for me, the worst part is questioning whether your feelings are valid or you're simply paranoid. I hate exposing that personal weakness, but...

Hi, I introduced myself to the boards a couple of days ago. I am mono and my partner is poly. I am his primary and he has recently ended an 8 year secondary relationship and is in the process of beginning a new one. Actually, tonight is their first sexual encounter and I am having a hard time...

Hi, LovelyLady here. I am a woman in love with a man who loves others. We're not new to this lifestyle but new to the labels. I guess I am a mono to a poly? My man has recently ended his secondary relationship of 8 years and is in the process of starting a new one. I think the beginning of a...