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In reading some of the more troubled blogs, or when looking at a new member posting their troubling transition to polyamory, I feel that there may be an underlying similarity between poor relationships that has to do with repairing after an argument. We all argue. We all fight. We generally...

Hi There Echo, Firstly, a warm welcome to the polyamory forums and sorry that your intro to poly is happening at such a difficult time for you with family stressors. I'm hearing you say that jealousy and insecurity are the driving forces behind your need for control of your current...

We're never getting back on track after this! :P

If you've never come across it, there's this concept of love languages that many swear by. Essentially, the theory is that different people like to receive different things to feel loved. For some, receiving gifts from their significant other is viewed preciously as love. For others, receiving...

I'm the most sexually inexperienced person on this forum, Icesong, so of I'm giving bad sex advice, just ignore me please. :) I'm wondering if Knight's love language involves physical touch. If so, his plea for seduction may be him just asking for his love language, no different to asking for...

Hi there Lifelover I'm glad if any of the advice I've shared has been helpful. Things definitely do get better though frequent backsliding is common. It will be hard for your partner to give up what he has with J. The book I suggested has a whole chapter devoted to this concept and explores it...

Coming out is probably a bridge you can cross later, unless your husband wants to discuss the specifics now.

Welcome to the forums. A new poly journey can be exciting and challenging. Hopefully, seeing some examples of what others in similar situations have done before may help on your own journey. Welcome aboard, Shaya.

Your blog reads like a metereological forecast station. ;)

Welcome to all three of you, It sounds like an awesome time and I hope you really enjoy it. Without meaning to burst the bubble, triads can have challenging times. Maybe forewarned is forarmed? I recommend the search function to see what kind of issues other triads have come up against. When I...

There's a few MFFM stories in the blogs section. Some of Icesong's earlier stories comes to mind at the moment, but I'm sure there's more.

Welcome to the forums you monogamous triad. You'll find lots of real life stories and real life advice here. The search function at the top of the page is your friend. Good luck on your polyamorous journey, Shaya.

Hi there. You may have to consider what if the new guy likes one of you romantically but not the other. You may also like to consider what would happen if he likes and dates both of you now but then loses interest with one of you. Otherwise, good luck with polyamory and good luck with (what I...

I think it depends, Karen, on who you're keeping secrets from. Keeping secrets often involve outright lies or lies of omission. Keeping secrets from your partner can be hurtful and i hear you say you don't dispute the pain an affair can cause. But you could also be lying to your children when...

Hi Sunray. You sound like you have a stable and healthy approach to poly. Look forward to hearing more of your story. I feel you'd also be able to share some good advice for those of us starting poly. Looking forward to seeing more of you around. Shaya.

Hi Jenn While I agree in principle with the logic you presented, I suspect the reality may not be quite so well balanced. For example, what if it starts as a beautiful love between all 3 of you, a triad, then she starts loving your boyfriend less or your boyfriend starts loving her less, or...

I feel demoralized. Life stressors outside the relationship impact the way I think, feel and sleep. Not blaming them for my relationship woes - those I own myself - but they certainly make relationshipping harder. A series of fights, the last one about nothing. It's not so much the content of...

I worry for my relationship to the point where i sometimes think I'm grieving it's potential loss. The emotion can be labelled as anxiety I guess. Sounds like it's different for you though.

Hi For someone going through such a tumultuous time, you pose very well-formed questions. Your #5 speaks to me. In #5, you mention jealousy or insecurity making you fearful that he might now find another romantic partner at a time when you feel your relationship is vulnerable. Part of that...

Be blunt with him. Like a blunt hammer or flat piece of wood. Sometimes with hormones raging we don't get the blunt message the first time. Be blunt again. Just my thought since you thought you may have been giving mixed messages.