Search results

What exactly does this mean? What does this 'support' from the other woman look like? Does this mean she is content to live in her own home, take care of herself by herself, while 'supporting' your home and family? By 'come what may....' are you saying that this hypothetical woman will...

You have a choice. Tell her no, you're not agreeing to this. If she wants to file, then the destruction of the family is on her. Read enough posts on this forum and you'll find this is a strong pattern in the poly world. Women usually have a much easier time finding men to agree to...

He said he didn't want to....but you could talk. So you talked and decided you wanted to do more than talk....he figures you'll cheat anyway...no, he's not happy....he changed the subject until you GOT HIM to sit down... So you took care of your daughter while he was working to support all of...

Pot, meet Kettle. Your own posts tend to cram paragraphs together with no white space. It seems to me that your real point in this was to cut his legs out from under him and thus hint that what he's actually saying might be invalid. I agree with virtually everything Ravenscroft said. You say...

It sounds to me as if her husband is pretty clear that he's not happy with her having a boyfriend. What is the point of marriage counseling or researching poly? To convince him he really loves this situation when he's being pretty clear that he doesn't? Would it be equally reasonable to suggest...

It sounds to me like she's doing sexual things with you to keep your husband, not because she's really into it. There are really only two choices about what to do. Keep doing sexual things with a drunk girlfriend who apparently doesn't really want to be there, or stop doing them.

Your title said it all. None of the long story changes anything. You don't want a threesome. End of story. Why is this even a question? How do you explain???? "No." If she asks again? "No." If she asks again? "No." If she's too stupid to see a pattern, quit hanging out with her. Quit...

There are many reasons why people leave poly. People can learn from those reasons about what works and what doesn't. I don't see it as cordoning anyone off. I see it as a more focused area where people know where to look for a general nature of discussion. Just as we know to look in the Life...

Orlando, your concerns are perfectly valid. Your body your choice. You are entitled to take any and all precautions with your health that you like. And you're not obligated to sleep with anybody. Who cares what anybody thinks of your decision not to sleep with them. Are they worried about your...

I have ghosted and would do it again in part because you don't know who people really are or how they'll react. I've had a couple of guys push me for a direct response and then get quite ugly, accusing me of ridiculous things and I don't want to be as blunt as to point out that, no, it's not...

I'm with Starlight. I like the idea of a new forum for formerly poly and I'm actually surprised at some of the negative responses toward such an idea. Many people who posted here have left poly for various reasons and I think those reasons contribute to the discussion of what makes for...

You nailed it. My cousin tried to commit suicide and while she was still in the hospital my mother was telling everyone she was 'just trying to get attention.' Maybe some people are manipulating by threatening suicide, but most people are genuinely hurting when they say these things. It seems...

Very exciting news! I have a new nephew on the way, too.

Hm...what makes me tell the story again? I wonder if that's a question that is asked of everyone who writes their story, or their memoir, sometimes years after the fact. If the goal is to do poly well, in a way that leaves everyone loved and happy and fulfilled, then we have things to learn...

Go. He's an alcoholic who breaks agreements, lies to you for months on end, and leaves you feeling that you're the one who needs to do the work to fix things. What future do you honestly see with him?

Interesting choice of words. It's exactly how I ended up feeling with XBF. A side dish. He got very agitated and upset when I said it (after telling me I could tell and ask him anything.) He couldn't explain how I wasn't a side dish to the main course he had at home. So he just got agitated...

Hi, luna, yes, I've read quite a bit about narcissism and yes, he absolutely fits the profile in many ways. I'm well aware he's not going to change how he's living and yes, I know his sob stories are a ploy for sympathy. Tone doesn't always come across in writing, and I'm saying this almost...

I may provide more background later, but today I'll stick with saying, recent events continue to convince me that our relationship was not as full of altruistic selfless love as he claimed. Rather that his brand of poly really is all about himself and his wife. He never meant to hurt me but...

I sympathize with your hurt over the relationship changing. But the fact is, as human beings, we invariably end up in positions where we must put someone first. You are long distance and have a primary. He has made a choice that he is going to prioritize his fiancée, who is local and more...

Regardless...it's about applying a thought or belief or judgment to ALL people of one gender. It is NOT about an attitude that applies to one particular person. Well, that's delightful. But that's not what I'm talking about. :rolleyes: I'm talking about a straightforward simple pleasantry...