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Sorry to hear things have been rocky the last two days. Sounds like you've been sort of the odd woman out. This can be hard on your self esteem, can really play on your insecurities. When I feel like this, it helps me to get centered if I can remind myself of the things I really love about...

I don't know how this relates to poly relationships, but it seems to me that most monogamous relationships start with a big, NRE-based sexual bang, and then settle into sort of a 'routine sex' situation. Where you typically desire sex much less than initially, but you still do it fairly...

Seems my problem is worse than I realized. I bought the WD-40, but I couldn't remember where to put it... Anotherbo :eek:

I'm sorry to hear you're in such a tough situation right now. :( From my experience with depression, it's hard to believe that anything will get better when you're deep in it. But once you are in a better place, depression-wise, these problems might not seem so unsolvable. Good luck, man. Hang...

Your situation is reminding me strongly of PollyPocket's current journey, but from an opposite perspective. Some of the difficulties in adding a third to an established marriage or relationship seem to be about power. It sounds like A has exercised her power in a way that makes it harder for...

Somebody mentioned handfasting in another thread, and this made me think of a possible solution to your issue. In my mind, the problem with polyamory and a marriage certificate is, only one relationship can have that piece of paper around these parts. The handfasting ceremony, in contrast, can...

Just wanted to check in (if you're still monitoring these forums), and see how you're holding up.

I'm glad the 2-pole concept was useful to you, Pollypocket. And upon further reflection, I'm thinking that my idea about trying to unring the bell is unworkable, at least in your case. More thoughts: its seeming more and more obvious that you are REALLY into C. I suspect that if you weren't...

That's an interesting problem to find yourself with, Derby, and an interesting solution. It always feels a little off-kilter when you start having sex with another after a drought, in my experience. And my experience with this phenomenon is considerable! I'll keep it short since it this is...

I'm with Mono, thanks for sharing! I really like that Oscar Wilde quote too.

Polypocket, I'm not a shrink... but I do play one on TV. Are you asking for a suggestion for how to move toward acceptance of losing C as a friend and a lover? If so, I'm not really sure. But personally I'm not convinced its all doomed yet. All three of you have to recognize, you tried to...

/agree Tonberry /agree LovingRadiance I think lots of people worry about losing friendships more than they worry about ironing this out. And it does often lead to hurt feelings. And Mono... after all those beatings... I just hope you can still walk, talk and... whatever. Anotherbo :)

Lots of interesting takes on what is sex. But thinking further on this, I feel there is something very unique about a penis penetrating a vagina. It just has a special place in my heart! Maybe that's because almost all babies start this way. Anotherbo :) P.S. Bah, TL4everu2 and...

For me personally, I wouldn't exactly feel used. But I would feel undervalued and not very interested in investing further in this friendship. Just my two cents, no idea if Ari feels used or not. Anotherbo :)

Don't knock it til you've tried it. Anotherbo ;)

What a crazy roller coaster this has been. At least you seem to have a seat now, instead of being strapped to the bottom. You've been pretty clear about feeling left out and hurting about your husband and C's intimacy at times, and feeling insecure and jealous. But I've been suspecting for a...

Every bit of this sounds wonderful! Especially reconnecting so strongly with your husband again! And finding more balance (and sleep). And having such a productive, fulfilling, active weekend that still managed to feel relaxing (or at least on Monday). So glad to hear things have been...

This is a bit off topic, but I just read the book you referenced in your first post, Sperm Wars by Robin Baker. Parts of it were very disturbing to me, but I found all of it to be enlightening and interesting. I'm a little confused at your interpretation as it applies to this topic though. A...

Ah, sorry you couldn't get through, don't know what happened there. But I wasn't left wondering, I knew you had a busy day planned and didn't expect to hear from you. In any case, the timetable of my trip turned out to be very tight, and then I was up til 6am talking to a new friend! She...

This is exactly what I'm hoping to find locally. Online you can reach more people with the same issues, but you just can't get the same level of communication if you're not face-to-face. But don't call it group therapy if you want any guys to attend! "What's a real man's idea of group...