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Love the tan line on the hip and inner boob …nice work

In any event, what they did or had in the 6-month LDR is not even in the same galaxy of what she’s proposing now. IMO, it’s essentially starting from scratch. How long have you been traveling and been gone? Has being apart helped or changed anything with her, like clear your thoughts and...

So essentially, they were dating just non-exclusively, and maybe remained in contact after she left for school, and got together on breaks and holidays? Does she acknowledge her lack of education on this shift in dating strategies, and how that could be a real issue/problem? It sounds like...

I think you do a disservice to the forum and the poly community with this elitist, enlightened attitude. Slut shaming is bad, but it’s okay to shame someone for the dating/mating preferences, that being one-on-one. Holy fuck, what a rube. What a hick!! Poor slob doesn’t have the bandwidth. He’s...

Hi. Welcome to the forum. How long was she in that poly relationship before it blew up? How many poly relationships has she been in? Any idea on how much research or education she did prior to and/or during said poly/open experience? Has the drop off in your sex life directly coincided with...

At the time (10-yr mark) why or how did you decide to open your marriage? Whose idea was this? What type of research or education did you do separately or as a couple at the time? Would you describe your situation as having a solid foundation? Your sexual dynamic makes you uncomfortable. That’s...

Title of the thread, "half open relationship." OP said hearing the details was VERY arousing in the moment, and that their sex life had actually picked up, as a result. Not the typical things we hear from the average mono dealing with a poly partner. In my experience, people trying to date...

Hi. Welcome to the forum. So is it that you’ve been open for the past two yrs, and just recently has your wife got a partner that has stuck? OR that it’s taken the past 2 yrs to discuss, prepare, and educate yourselves, and to restructure your marriage, to just recently start (in the past 2...

It could depend on what side of the coin you’re on, if you’re the the new interest or the established partner.

I think what he’s saying is those type of words are meaningless, in a lot of cases.

I’m doing the math and it looks like you were mono for about half. Were those affairs considered cheating? Were they the reasons to explore poly? Was there an education process before the flag dropped? Cart - horse or horse - cart? Timing and planning actually matter. Did she do any research...

I get you’re trying to be supportive, but do you get what you’re saying here? Yes, it could be NRE, but at the same time, people saying whatever they’re saying are dead serious, and don’t think they’re saying anything crazy. The whole idea behind polyamory is being autonomous and free with...

I have to second what Mags said in that 1) this isn’t really a poly issue, and 2) I don’t want to tell you what you’re feeling, but to me, it seems like you’re upset that your wife and these other guys aren’t bending to/honoring your kink, because nobody thinks they actually owe you that. WAS...

It’s probably more nuanced than words on a page. The character of the people involved and the language they use would definitely play a role. How much of this could be NRE-related and exuberance burn off? Etc., etc. That said, I'd personally take it in the most maximum/literal sense, so as to...

Are you both out to your family and social community? Do you feel like this somehow reflects on you in that public space, as well in your private marital space? Has anyone commented to you about them or him? Could you be embarrassed for her, and then by extension it creeps back to you?

Hi Ken, welcome to the forum. Were you in a committed mono relationship the entire 19 yrs? Why did it take 13 yrs to marry? Besides her strong feeling for another man, has she done any research or education on what’s entailed in a poly relationship? Are things becoming more pressing now vs 2...

Hi and welcome to the forum. It makes perfect sense for someone transitioning a 14-yr marriage.👍 Do you think this is or was a speed issue or a bait and switch issue? Are you saying hypothetically poly or ENM might be great in the future but you’re not emotionally ready right this second ...

Hey Ruby, also welcome to the forum You have to realize that was meant in the broadest, most general sense, to the widest-possible audience and admittedly, one size doesn’t fit all. That said, when significant structural change occurs in a marriage, it might be better to acknowledge the old...

Hey Blue. Welcome to the forum. What you’re describing sounds to me like swinging, which is a team sport, with a core rule to protect the team and to compartmentalize sex as physical recreation. PolyAMORY is an individual sport. It also has a high component of physical recreation, but there...

I agree. I’d print out 2 copies of screenshots of all the sexting material, and hand one to her and one to the counselor. I’m not sure cheaters have the right to complain on the method in which they’re caught. Do we actually know this is, or was, considered a violation of her privacy? I...