Search results

ha, ha, welcome to my life. OK, so we don't live together but my partner is having a relationship with my sister and if it works out, down the track when her teenagers have left the nest, poly co-habitation is something my partner has always wanted to try. It's his ideal, don't know how Sis and...

I can see how for people who identify as poly, being asked how they got that way is a much the same as asking someone who's gay how they got that way. I don't identify as poly although if polyamory has a spectrum I probably sit somewhere in the middle, between poly and mono. When I was married...

I think that for some people it is simply who they are and as such the roots are untraceable. For others I think it could have links in the past. My partner was raised by an overworked and probably emotionally vacant mother and an older sister who was more nurturing of him. His sister left home...

Hey Redpepper, It is always good to read your posts and see how you are. I really appreciate the depth of your openness. I'm giving polyamory my most serious shot to date, due to the fact that my partner is dating my sister. Interesting times. My current thinking is that poly people should be...

I think I'm in a similar place to you, except that I'm still very much in my nesting relationship with Mike. I explored poly for myself but it didn't feel good for me. I have retained one male friend, however, and it's a very interesting and challenging experience. We have been intimate and we...

I just popped in to post about a great movie that Mike saw last night and saw that you're back. Yay!!! I find this to be the best thread on the whole site and so appreciate your honesty and willingness to be so open with your journey. Thank you, Sage

The poly groups on Yahoo groups are good especially for subsections of the poly world (polymono, polyfidelity, expansive loving, and there's one for poly people in relationship with monos called livingpolymono)

My partner went to see "Her" this last night and said it was one of the best films he has ever seen. The story is about a guy who has an operating system for a girlfriend and yep, she's totally polyamorous. :D

HI Nice to see some old names here, Ari, LR, SNeacail. I'm back because I'm giving poly a go for myself, and one of the first things I'm learning to deal with is the loneliness of being apart from a love. I read the Pema Chodron article and it was just what I needed. Loneliness is obviously...

Thanks Kevin but you probably realise it isn't really a matter of 'the tables being turned'. I think one of the positives of polyamory is that it tends to bring up our 'stuff' to be dealt with. We can be fine with things on an intellectual level but all kinds of emotions can come to the fore. My...

Thanks for reviving this thread NYC :-). I was still subscribed to it and it flashed through on my email. Intro post for quick catch up as to where I am in terms of poly, (quite excited). Anyway, Ive lost 40lbs in weight using HCG drops, and Zen's lost 20. Unfortunately they aren't legal in the...

I was on this forum, a couple of years ago now as the mono in a relationship with a poly partner. Got my act together with some amazing help from you guys and left the forum because I felt I was sorted on the poly front. I see there a still a few familiar names here from the past but most of...

Hi RP, I haven't been on the forum for ages due to study, work and having sorted out our poly/mono status to the point where it is no longer an issue for us. NYCindie messaged me to remind me to get rid of the links to my blog (which I have taken down) and I just had to check in on your blog to...

SH, Not at all, I was touched and flattered but I've been around long enough to know that so many others who spend a lot more time helping than I do, especially the moderators on the forum. I used to help a lot more but since I've truly sorted my own relationship I'm not as motivated. I'm also...

Shattered Reality I'm pleased I could be of so much help, but I am only giving back a little of what others offered me when I was going through similar feelings. Take care Sage

Urmila Yes, my lust over love comment came about because from your post the relationship between your husband and cousin seemed to have developed so quickly. It sounded very much like NRE rather than the kind of love that you have for someone you have built a life with and that you know warts...

Shattered Reality, I'm glad you found us and I hope it gets easier for you, but that will depend on your wife as much as on you. Coming to terms with this kind of thing is a joint exercise in loving at a level most people never consider. it's a level where you both walk a very narrow strip...

Resignation is not a particularly healthy way of looking at this, even though I think we all fall into it at times, it is defeatist and no one wants to feel defeated. It's really important for monos to find the positives for themselves in their mono-poly relationship. I have a post on that under...

It doesn't sound as if he has really accepted your polyamory.

Sigh... This is all too complex for me to get into at this late stage. I would just comment that it is unrealistic to expect monos in poly relationships to be logical and to respond in a linear way. It is my experience that dealing with a poly partner is a hugely emotional experience and our...