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  1. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    It is stressful. :( It's been difficult, at best. The first two days/nights after they returned, he was slamming doors and banging crap around after I had to be in bed. It was infuriating, and it also resulted in me not getting any sleep, which then resulted in my mental health issues being...
  2. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    Tomorrow night Maca returns with SourPea. I haven't seen SP, for all intents and purposes, in over 2 months. I am looking forward to her coming home. However, my anxiety is through the roof over Maca's return. There is no "working it out," and there is no "moving out," which means being...
  3. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    Extraordinarily busy, but good. Maca continues to have drama, and now he's also having health issues. He is still cycling about every 2 weeks through hating me and loving me. I'm not in the cycle any longer. During his last trip back to see the kids, which was in May, we knocked out a large...
  4. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    Started work yesterday. Thursday I go to the interview for the apprenticeship. Busy week. Car repairs/maintenance, bike maintenance. Need to buy black slacks for work. Busy busy. But doing ok.
  5. LovingRadiance

    Redpepper's journey

    Well (ironically), the statement I made to Maca last night seems a fitting response in your circumstance. We were having a similar discussion about kids and such. He was saying that he didn't see how we could both live in this house (2400 square feet, and by next summer it will have an...
  6. LovingRadiance

    is this a deal breaker?

    Not necessarily. Both my current partner and I have cut in the past. In both cases it's been years, but we both struggle with anxiety and severe depression. What's been amazing about having a partner who also struggles with these issues, is that he's much more aware of how to be a functional...
  7. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    With every little crisis I have to solve alone, my hatred, resentment and fury towards Maca grows. I've reached a place of damn near complete apathy regarding GG. But with Maca, my fury is increasing.
  8. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    "LR, We are pleased to inform you that you meet the minimum requirements for the apprenticeship and have been scheduled for an oral interview with the Joint Apprenticeship Training Committee. You must call this office at !@#$@$#@ no later than 48 hours prior to your interview to confirm your...
  9. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    Copying what I wrote in RP's blog because I'm too lazy to rewrite the parts that are pertinent to mine. Love you to death, RP. Wish I lived closer. It is creepy, in a kind of "I don't feel so alone" way, how many things are similar in our lives, for YEARS now, especially considering how little...
  10. LovingRadiance

    Redpepper's journey

    I love you to death, RP. I wish I lived closer. It is creepy in a kind of "I don't feel so alone" way how many things are similar in our lives, for YEARS now, especially considering how little we communicate with one another. Our lives seem to be hellbent on reminding us how similar we are. Is...
  11. LovingRadiance

    New to this in Anchorage

    Alaska is a hard one when it comes to "meeting" people who are polyamorous, unless you get involved in the LGBT community and/or the BDSM community in a big way. That said, I live in Wasilla, I go to school at UAA, I work in Anchorage. I have been very involved in the LGBT community and I know...
  12. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    I'm not sure which part you are responding to. But to be clear, GG is no longer my partner and hasn't been for almost 2 years. He's my ex and he needs to get his head out of his ass or he is going to lose all rights to contact with the children. He already lost all rights to any further contact...
  13. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    No, he has no legal rights at all. But cutting him off completely would be devastating to Sour Pea, at the very least, which doesn't mean it won't happen, but it does mean taking that into consideration before doing something drastic. Maca and my sister contacted him in the last 24 hours to let...
  14. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    I used to believe that he was too dense. But I'm starting to think its neither density or apathy. I think he's intentionally doing it. Of course, he swears otherwise. It is now 6:48 pm. He was supposed to drop our child off at 6:30, and they are not here. I'm fucking pissed. I'm fucking fed up.
  15. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    I told him he wasn't allowed on the property, that he could meet Sour Pea at the mail boxes (across the street) and specified dates and times. In less than 24 hours he walked straight in the front door with her. The issue there is he doesn't have a key, but if the kids are home, he just...
  16. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    I told GG to stay off the property, and laid out a visitation schedule for when he can pick up Sour Pea, etc. Less than 24 hours later, I walk in and find him in my kitchen. I lost it. Maca called him to tell him to get out, but wtf good is that? NO RESPECT FOR MY HOME OR MY SPACE OR ME. None...
  17. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    I found out yesterday that GG has been taking my Adderall "until he could get a new prescription" (which means I don't have the amount needed until I get MY new prescription). I am FURIOUS. WTF? (That is rhetorical.) I am SO SICK AND TIRED OF PEOPLE JUST WALKING ALL OVER MY FUCKING BOUNDARIES...
  18. LovingRadiance

    New to this in Anchorage

    The local group (at least as of a year or so ago) was a pretty hefty mix of ages from early 20s-60s and primarily unmarried or solo polys. When it originally began almost 5 years ago, I was one of the organizers. I am no longer involved, but I can say there is a large group of poly people in...
  19. LovingRadiance

    Just LR

    He was here 66 hours (yes, I counted). He was SUPPOSED to be here 10 days, but he altered his plans because, "We aren't spending your bday together anyway." So of those, there were three nights of sleeping. We'll just deduct 24, and that leaves 42 total waking hours he COULD spend with the...
  20. LovingRadiance

    Psych student, here. Need help from the experienced?

    You can pm me questions if you like.
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