Search results

I feel like there is a lot of judgment against the husband. He may be a terrible person; but he may have just been too weak to hold firm to his desires for non-monogamy. I'm not excusing his behavior; you should simply be very clear about your needs; not pretend you don't have them, and then...

I understand how you feel, but I can also see this from the husband's point of view. Bear in mind, we are going on limited information on the forums. What I'm hearing is you had an open relationship, then closed it. Later on, he wanted to open it again...and then fell in love with the woman...

Couple of things I think it's cool that you are so sure of what you want. Just a bit of advice: If this woman is going to be your husband's girlfriend/wife, he really needs to do the seeking himself. I know he's busy. But if he's too busy to look; he's too busy to maintain two romantic...

She's poly and has a husband, as well as A. It's not cool for her to control his relationship with you. If she isn't comfortable being where you and A are, that's fine, she can stay home. If I were you, I would be gentle, but firm, and explain that if he needs permission from her to date you...

Lots of perfectly functioning triads exist. I'd be cautious though about your forcing a sexual or romantic relationship with the other woman. It's usually better if that happens naturally; and it's okay if it ends up being a "vee," with him as the hinge between you and her. You never know...

You should never feel bad about not wanting sex. It's not as if you're preventing either guy from having sex with other women. As for being pregnant, ummm, yeah, they kind of have a right to know. Plus they'll be happy for you. Have you been excited and supportive of her? If not, I could...

It's actually reassuring to me to hear about other crazy metamours :) Not that I don't feel for you :-p

It's very judgemental to assume all attached women want to hide other relationships from their significant others. Isn't your wife a contradiction to that assumptIon?

Not a bad start, but a few things: 1) Polygamy is not the same as polyamory. Polyamory is simply the freedom to have multiple romantic relationships. It's not a marriage structure. 2) Couple privilege, such as you speak of when you say you need to remain the dominant male, usually leads to...

I understand the OP. I mean, I may or may not. But I can see why she might be concerned. To me, if you accept me as poly, you don't put a "stop" to that at any time. Anymore than you could tell me to quit my job for a month. Or stop seeing my friends for a month. I, and I'm sure the OP...

I disagree, politely, but disagree. Of course I could keep myself busy for two months. That doesn't mean I'm still available for them when they decide they're ready for me again..... I'm hardly going to put my life on hold for two months.

You say you've been "poly." Just how "poly" are you? :) Because that really makes all the difference. If you're mostly casually dating; accepting OKCupid dates, etc. I don't think it's unreasonable to take a stop from dating (bear in mind, if you HAVE started dating someone, and it's brand...

Are you open to or seeking multiple emotional relationships? And I don't mean friends (monogamous people have lots of emotional connections to many people). I mean, in a romantic/intimate sense. If so, then yes, I would say you're poly. There's a difference, though, between identifying as...

Well, this came out of nowhere. And thank you for not deleting this post; it's good for others to see examples of poly relationships, functional or otherwise. I'm curious why the OP is defending his girlfriend who is acting jealous and insecure, but he was the one who asked us all for help...

I don't have a MIL, but I do have a metamour, so, practically the same thing ;)

It's good that your husband is being so patient with you. But really, if you can't figure out what's wrong, that's going to cause issues. Because relationship problems are because of the two people in that particular relationship, not because of other people. If you're having a jealousy issue...

Ugh. If my friend made me choose which of my partners to bring (assuming I was able to be open), I would just not come at all.

Oh, and to further complicate, it started out as an open relationship, not poly. It evolved from a physical fling to something we both wanted to be a romantic relationship. So, when does "Day One" start? Day One from realizing I was poly? Took me about six months to adjust to the idea-- just...

This poll is a bit vague. "Being out" has different levels. To me, it's not 100% out unless you are as free with the poly relationship as a monogamous; in other words, freely attending work/family functions with the various partners; posting on Facebook; casually mentioning when someone asks...

It is one thing to invite drama in your life...I have for very personal reasons...but please don't discount the level of psychosis displayed. My friend DID have a woman pull a gun on her once. In a public building. Because of a poly situation. So, don't think that's a crazy suggestion, please!