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This is related to the thread title, but not directly to your situation. I've been thinking about the concept of moving at the pace of the one who is struggling the most. If both partners want to create more openness in their relationship, I believe it truly works and is an excellent way to move...

You've always done things right. It was never about what you thought.

Here's a post about the power of respecting boundaries. http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=772

Follow the link in her signature ;)

You have to realize the audience you are putting this question out to. It's not a judgement or slight against anyone, but if you were on a forum or support group for mono partners with poly partners you'd get a different type of response. A lot of people on here are coming from the perspective...

Being monoamorous with a polyamorous partner is a little like the image of Peter Pan flying carefree over Never Never Land, hand-in-hand with Wendy. Your heart is filled with that child-like joy of being with someone who is the focus of your world, and you feel like that to them. Then you feel...

Bingo!! I feel compersion for my friends who have a good bike ride :) People experience it all the time but don't realize it.

You could be right :)....more self analysis coming up. I'd say we are stronger..or at least better defined in what we can give each other. All good I think :)

As I see compersion it is very real and, for me, without jealousy. I feel this daily towards RP and her husband and her girlfreind. That does not mean I am not a jealous person LOL! I know what jealousy feels like for sure. What it does mean is that in a least these two rare cases I have found...

Although fear is not a word I normally associate with in matters of the heart, you are right that even looking at this scenario is a long way from last year. Redpepper and I have discussed some things related to increased freedom for her and the only fear I have is my own motivations. Am I...

This thread has a very sad overtone that I just figured out. There are a lot of women who feel they have very little power in this society...and it's not the women who have agreed to OPPs...it's the ones that can't accept that some women can do it willingly by their own choice. Compromise is not...

Sick of people whining about being victims and clinging to the past like their present day existence will evaporate if they join the rest of society in the present. There is a lot of heavily damaged people around me..to the point that I feel almost normal ;;)

15 years is a rarity...you've obviously figured something out to have that kind of longevity :)

Thanks for all your sharing my friend.

OMG!!! I'm not really monogamous...I just fell in love with Zylya ;)

I love the respect and genuine understanding you show in this comment. I also like the fact that you don't portray monogamy as unhealthy.

Thank you for putting this so clearly! Not that I want other partners, but I have tried to imagine what that would likely look like for me if I wanted to explore more openness in my relationship as a way to give RP more freedom. Your situation is more closely to what I think that would look...

Smoochie Lilo! I love you :)

Sorry all of this happened Derby. Hopefully something good will come out of it in the form of learning for him. Sad that this kind of stuff can put an awkward rift in our already relatively small community ;(

Thanks for sharing this, River. It's a common theme of the whole thing being overshadowed by a small visible group. Same thing in Victoria BC.