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Actually, I don't engage with him on that level at all. It's Vanilla who asks him to stop pestering her with topics she doesn't want to talk about. This morning the big topic was politics, which Vanilla has no interest in at all. While I'm super-political person, I assume that if Vanilla wants...

Oh my, isn't there like pretty standard seven days to each week? Which dimension do you squeeze your activities in?!? :D No, actually, just happy to read about other happy busy bees.

Hello and welcome! I personally don't mind reading long posts if they are as well articulated and thought of as yours is. Do you have a specific thing you'd like to ask? From a quick read, it seems you are just rewording how you feel. I don't mean to belittle anything when I use "just" -it's a...

Bitter and unfair bitching below the belt I've spent a little more time with Chip and wonder how exactly Vanilla sees that a change from Cookie to Chip is better. A brief comparison between Cookie and Chip 1. Is hostile to women (check for both) 2. Is enthusiastic about game theory and how...

I don't know if you can miss the mark if there was no preset mark in the first place :D. Thank you both, I've enjoyed reading very different perspectives. I guess I could summarize my own situation; atm I have no sexual relationships, since we no longer connect in that way with my live-in...

This comes up in so many threads on the Poly Relationship Corner and is one of the things that seems to worry people new to poly a lot. So I wanted to start a thread that is not necessarily problem/crisis centered around it. What effect, if any, do you feel poly has on the sex life you have? Is...

So he met this lady outside of poly circles? I'm curious as to your choice of phrasing - it was you, not him, that brought up that he has duties as well. How did this relationship get started? Introducing her to the kids after three weeks is not a good idea imho. Possibly she is just referring...

Hi Krysten and glad you have found your way here! There are good people and good advice around. Just because he says now that he can never ever share you in any romantic way at all, doesn't mean it shall always be like this. Keep the lines of communication open and focus on building trust and...

Wallet found! The day hospital thing isn't happening because Vanilla isn't feeling bad enough - she would basically have to attempt suicide or be diagnosable with something major to qualify for admission :(. This is a good point - thank you, BD :o. I don't understand it, but I don't have to...

Growing pains Is what I'm having right now. Yesterday night Vanilla came to bed and confessed to having found a lump besides her cervix. It freaked me out (mum, cancer, remember?). I asked if she wanted to make an appointment to see the doctor herself or if I should do it. She asked me to do...

Oh my, looking good! A bit like secret service agents (why am I reminded of the series NCIS)?¨ I didn't realize there was such a height difference between the guys.

Boundary patrol Through talking to a multitude of people from all walks of life, I'm becoming gradually more aware of what my particular boundaries are when it comes to my relationship with Vanilla vis-a-vis poly. I feel that why I am definitely not a vanilla at least most of the time, I'm no...

Just wanted to speed update: I think something really moved forward last night with Vanilla. We were able to discuss her sex addiction, why it bothers her, what possibly could be done to alleviate the burden it places on her and our relationship, and finished with a plan to move forward.

Haven't read anyone else's responses as yet. 1) Define "polyamory" in a sentence or phrase. The ability and willingness to form romantic/sexual relationships with multiple people at the same time. 2) Give us a quick snapshot of yourself. Whatever you want to share in a few sentences...

Sweet, when in doubt, use LATEX! And educate folks about the issue. Take it as a gift. You can become the Neighbourhood Goddess of HPV Awareness! I'm infected, Vanilla's infected, we've both had abnormalities that have since disappeared. I'm told approx. 80% of the population round these parts...

Hullo there! We are going through a bit similar situation with my partner, so I thought to chime in. I leave the salve and vitamin tips to the more experienced among us. The only thing that would come to me on top of my head would be a good warmup and avoiding hard individual strikes, but if...

I hear you. This quad doesn't have the benefit of everyone being friends beforehand, but like said, you never know. I don't actually know this girl very well, and it's none of my concern really. So true :p. And I don't really need distractions. I have two jobs, an unfinished thesis, two book...

I did it! Sorta. But it was exciting. Just texting "I hope you are okay with us only seeing each other as friends from now on". Standing up for myself is exciting! I have a minor issue with poly non-judgement atm. A girl I know has recently moved in with a MFM triad/vee as the newest addition...

Second that. I saved the email notification I received with your post in it for future reference. Slightly related, have you checked out the videos by Austra and/or Florence and the Machine? Wonderful imagery and strikingly beautiful women!

I'm officially not giving anyone poly advice since my own life is on the rocks, and you have had plenty of really good advice already. However, as to why do poly if you can be a happy mono? 1) My gf and I share many interests and passions, but not all. Both have individual interests that the...