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I am poly and would NEVER live with a metamour in my home. It's okay to tell your husband that that idea is off the table. Many serious poly partners never live together because they (or one of them) have other nesting partners. Do you actually enjoy being sexually non-monogamous? As in...

I think the kindest interpretation is that the wife tried to be okay with her husband having a serious girlfriend, and that she liked you as a person and maybe liked the idea of her husband dating you in theory, but she was not prepared for the reality of a full poly relationship where she would...

I'm confused why it's not an option for your husband to continue to date the girlfriend while remaining married to you, even if the girlfriend broke up with you. I mean, maybe you would not be okay with your husband continuing to date your ex-girlfriend. Maybe your ex-girlfriend does not want...

My last partner was larger than average, and his girth was SIGNIFICANTLY larger than average, yet he was still convinced that his dick is small. I asked him if he had ever actually seen other men's dicks outside of porn, and he admitted that his concept of dick size came exclusively from porn...

Do you actually want to go on a trip with Kaitlyn? Do you want to have the kind of polyamorous relationships where you can have a serious (or somewhat serious) girlfriend, i.e., a girlfriend that you go on trips with? A girlfriend who might want to see you during the holidays? A girlfriend who...

It is not okay to deliberately refuse to have sex with your girlfriend in the hope that this will push her to fuck other men so that you can get off on your cuck fantasy. It's dishonest and selfish. You need to tell your girlfriend that that's what you want so she can make an informed decision...

How old are you, your husband, and the girlfriend? How long have you been with/married to your husband?

It sounds like everything has been handled fine now and is resolved. Your son must have been worried you were cheating on his mom. He must have felt burdened by that knowledge until he talked to his mom. I think we tend to forget that when we are not "out" about ENM with (teenage) kids, they...

I do think these things are related to the age difference. I can understand why a 19 year old girl going to a hotel with a married 38 year old guy might feel like it connotes the idea of a "hooker" and makes her uncomfortable. It probably wouldn't be an issue for a woman in her 30s, or if...

Who has the chronic illness? (i.e., who is often out of commission/in pain/struggling physically/needing reliable help from a partner)

Did you know she was poly when you got together with her? How long have you been together? How long has she been poly dating?

Hi KittyRae, How old are you? How recent was your diagnosis and your realization that you're poly? Are these people that you are meeting in real life, or online? Are you meeting them through online dating, or somewhere else?

I think this is the girl who is a 19-year-old undergraduate, as described in Steve's other post :)

Would you happier if the guy were objectively super hot, smart, rich, successful, funny, interesting? You wouldn't feel jealous/threatened? What if he were super sexy but seemed like an asshole? What if he were completely similar to you, almost like a clone of you? In that case, would you feel...

Here are my thoughts, in no particular order: ENM involves rethinking relationships, a totally new paradigm, in which being at different life stages and different ages doesn't matter as much as it would with monogamy Maybe a 20-ish-year-old seeking something casual would be a better match for...

This sounds a little too troll-ish to be real, but in the spirit of generosity, let's say it is. So, you're saying you want to father 10 to 12 children yourself? With at least one to two women, who all live together and share the work? That's a lot of kids, so, kind of a lot of work. Will the...

What is your wife like apart from all this? As a person overall, as a partner, mother, colleague, friend...would you say she is emotionally healthy, happy, successful at navigating work relationships and friendships? Are your kids happy and doing well and getting along fine with her? Because...

How old is everyone? How long has everyone been poly? The problem here is the hinge. The Hinge has an insecure, jealous partner who deliberately was all over Hinge on the first meeting with a metamour (you) and THEN, instead of apologizing to you for making you uncomfortable, Hinge complains...

Thanks for the update. I am glad your relationship is still going well and you seem more used to the new situation now. I'll second Evie's advice that maybe there is a kink you'd like to be able to explore with your wife? Or maybe you'd be happier knowing fewer details of the scenes she does...

I am sorry to hear about Jay. It sounds like it would have been a lot of trouble navigating his monogamous mindset even without the narcissism. I'm glad you're doing well on your own. Good luck with your continued journey!