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Assuming that I don't have any commitments to P2 or S2, the only thing that happens here is that I let S know how I feel about the idea of their moving away, and then let them work out where they'd like to live. This'd be a not-fun conversation, because I know that I don't do LDRs well and...

Responded here.

Long response from another thread I'm going to try to keep this short enough to not be a hassle to read. I'm not sure how to take this critique. I could, for example, write that "I really dislike those people who use poly as a cover for being unable to make up their minds and settle down...

I think you're drawing some distinction between reading someone's post and "reading into" that post that I'm not clear on. When reading something someone else has written, I don't assume that I have perfect knowledge of authorial intent, if that's what's at issue. In any case, you and I are...

Welcome! Having community around you is often really important. You should also check out poly- groups in your area for support.

I also avoid accepting confidences that are supposed to be kept from my partner(s). Sometimes one has to make an exception, but I mostly don't owe people the burden of having to consider whether or not I can talk about something privately. I've known plenty of teenaged women who treat people...

It sounds from this that what you're looking for is a classic open relationship. You may confuse people if you identify as polyamorous, which is generally understood to be about having multiple ongoing romantic relationships, as opposed to being with other sexual partners on occasion. I think...

I wouldn't discount your opinion here as being "the nasty inside of you." I mean, you may be angry and hurt, but you're also simply correct. Nick doesn't deserve praise for what he's doing, and it's alarming that Nora thinks he does. Just because you're angry doesn't mean your assessment of the...

Hunh. If I thought that being poly- was keeping my relationships from reaching their maximum potential, or got in the way of building a foundation, I'd stop being poly-. From my perspective, I don't get how this advice is supposed to work in practice. Should I dump everyone I'm dating every...

If you think about monogamous dating, it's not at all unusual to have a couple of short term relationships that didn't quite work in between longer serious ones, so I wouldn't even say that your luck was "bad". Closer to average, really. That said, if you're exclusively dating people who...

With the emoticon there, I get that you're joking, but I sort-of think in the scenario that you describe there's a pretty reasonable chance that they were into you on some level and were looking for a way to start telling a story in which you were also into them.

SO's SO, and SO's SO's SO Sure, many people in Vs hang out all together. In fact, I think it's worrisome if that doesn't happen. I also think one should be just as affectionate as one normally is... but not if it is obviously freaking someone out. Yes, sometimes a V turns into a triad (and...

I think that I'll defend June a bit, at least on this point. It's important for people to ask for exactly what they want in relationships. If what June wants with you is a friendship (or a friendship with occasional benefits), she wouldn't be doing you any favours to pretend otherwise. And...

Congrats on finding something that is working well for you!

Yep. That not being normal is a warning sign. If they think it's normal, you're probably good.

Er... you should get to date and live with whoever you want. Seriously, don't date people just because it makes them, or someone else, happy. Don't live with people just because it makes them, or someone else, happy. Date only those people you're enthusiastic about dating! Live with people you...

That there's a link between being single and promiscuous isn't as readily assumed in the overall culture as a link between being poly- and promiscuous. That's one aspect. When we tell someone we're poly-, not a lot of people are going to think "Oh, I'm hearing this because I've made some...

Well, for the record, I'd like to think I'd respond reasonably well to someone saying that. I'll grant that if a bunch of people with fancy forum titles all said it together, though, I'd probably feel more unwelcome. Erm... that's not to suggest that fancy forum titles are a problem. I was...

This is a busy thread! I don't think it's quite so straightforward as that. But yeah, there are offensive things, and there are things we should be sorry about, and there are also probably times when people should step aside. Sometimes someone says something that I genuinely find offensive. I...

I don't think that's quite as paradoxical as it might seem. Maybe nobody ever wants to express themselves in a way that pushes back against someone else's unwelcoming expression. If that's the case, then the problem you're pointing at is really hard to solve. But I suspect that there's a way...