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Thanks for the tip SeventhCrow Seriously, I want to thank you. I went onto OKC a few minutes after you suggested it, and not long after I posted my profile, I found myself in a wonderful conversation with a married, new to polyamory woman in my area. Both of us are dealing with some of the...

very true YGirl I was alluding to a specific creep factor: the whole problem of being a non-creepy "married guy looking to meet someone" which is generally interpreted as the "married guy looking to cheat on his wife" creep. :P -M

The issue of creepiness Actually, one of the hardest things about the whole reunion with dating is the whole issue of making sure I *don't* come off as a creep.

Jumping down my throat... no I was wondering if I sounded kinda creepy, but I hope I clarified that. This isn't something that can have easy answers, especially when you factor in all the parties involved. I just feel like I'd be having a better time if this was something we were exploring...

a few clarifications I had a hard time starting this post, and I had a feeling it wasn't going to come off as well as I had expected. "Filling the void" isn't necessarily accurate for us. When Alice is out, I'm at home with our child, and vice versa. Were childcare not an issue, I don't think...

I think I've always known I just didn't know it was okay-- the aftermath of a Southern upbringing. When I started looking back on my unsuccessful career as a monogamist, one relationship really started to stack up for me-- my first. It was high school, and we were both really busy people. We...

It has been a crazy road for the past few weeks. I stopped posting, but here I am again. I'm the married man in a recently-formed V-relationship with my wife Alice, and her lover Jim, who is a friend of mine. While I was toppled with a lot of exterior professional pressures for the past three...

Great name. This Guybrarian approves.

No worries I wasn't trying to downplay it as a viable solution, nor was I insinuating that it was a problem that needed to be solved for you. I'm in no way an expert on this situation.

Mac: I'm really understanding your situation as it was really the only thing I was worried about after we decided to romantically pursue other people. I'm in Eugene, and I'm finding a lot of people around me are very keen on what is going on in my wife and I's relationship as we are kind of...

What a great thought As someone who worked in divorce law (divorce scares the hell outta me because of what I saw), I really wish that I'd learned that quote while I was working in the field.

Sorry this has been rough I will say though, my wife and I have alluded to all of this for years. We had a "some flirting" model that was a great placeholder. But we never wanted to make things too complicated for either of us. Plus the place where we lived would not have been conducive to this...

RP: I have to say that this is my planned approach too. I don't want to waste a lot of time skirting the issue and it is an intense issue, but I hope that my personality and my body language are able to deliver that issue well. Furthermore, I'd hate to ask someone out and then after they say...

A tangled web I weave Update only 30 minutes after my last post! This is some weird serendipity: I'm watching something and I get a text at 3 a.m. Its from Celine, the girl I can't get out of my head, asking, "What are you doing up at 3 in the morning?" and so, instead of trying to text her...

Update A few things are on my mind. Alice and I were, first-and-foremost, friends for several years before we dated. We talked about the most intricate of things about our relationships with other people. Now, I find myself extremely interested in the success of her emotional tie in her other...

Beat & Pepper Beat: I just want you to know, I'm your age, and this is AS new. Maybe a week. But I've embraced that attitude almost instantly. I am as happy as can be right now. This will work out and be grand and yes, I've already grown in many ways since I found an ideal that worked for me...

Another nugget of humor from yesterday evening Alice came home as Sally was walking out the door. After Sal left, we talked for about an hour, which was amazing. We talked about a few issues, especially the ones covered by Sally during my night's conversation. We came upon a topic that Sal...

BEXY and BEN: Thanks for the sound advice! Awesome addition to this thread.

Red Pepper: I really think we kinda grok about the whole total disclosure thing.

I do what I can *clinking of glasses* Cheers.