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  1. RitaFire

    Spreading the love around: does love lessen with more partners?

    It is for me too. I love sex and eroticism. I enjoy flirting and sexual tension. I think sex can enhance a relationship through the giving and receiving of pleasure. Is it love? It can be an expression of love, or it can be a way to satisfy a primal urge. Some relationships are meant to go...
  2. RitaFire

    Spreading the love around: does love lessen with more partners?

    I want to add something regarding love and sex. I watched the movie Black Snake Moan yesterday. It was fabulous! And one thing that struck me was the deep bonding relationship between Lazarus (Samuel L. Jackson) and Rae (Christina Ricci). They never had sex, and their love for each other was...
  3. RitaFire

    Spreading the love around: does love lessen with more partners?

    I can. But sometimes the lines can get a little fuzzy for me when it comes to men. I am straight, but also feel we are attracted to who we are attracted to, and I have not met a woman that I have had a crush on or felt lust for like I have with men. I am not saying it would be impossible for me...
  4. RitaFire

    Spreading the love around: does love lessen with more partners?

    Interesting... Can you explain that more? When I think of supplements, I think of something that we need because we are missing it. It is something that needs to be added because we are lacking in it. Rob and I talk a lot about this. I wonder if he realized he was poly because he felt he was...
  5. RitaFire

    Spreading the love around: does love lessen with more partners?

    Are you being a bit sarcastic with me? What works for some may not work for others, or it may take others longer to figure it all out. And I am not being judgmental on the choices one makes on how they want to live their life. What works for them may or may not work for me, or vice versa. I am...
  6. RitaFire

    Spreading the love around: does love lessen with more partners?

    Yes, but with them, it is a different kind of love than what I share with my husband, or what would be shared with an intimate romantic partner. My thinking has been that I need and want to give all of my romantic, intimate, love to one man, if he were my husband or committed partner. When I...
  7. RitaFire

    Spreading the love around: does love lessen with more partners?

    I can't tell you how much I appreciate everyone's willingness to share their experiences here. Thank you! This struck a chord with me: Maybe I should post a new topic for this. I often wonder if our love is diluted when we share it with more than one intimate partner. We only have so much...
  8. RitaFire

    Married and Poly?

    I was curious because many (not all, but many) of the poly people I have encountered so far are either divorced, getting divorced or are separated, or have never been married. I am wondering how many people are in the same situation as my husband and me. We got married many years ago (at least...
  9. RitaFire

    Married and Poly?

    I am curious as to how many of you are married and practicing poly.
  10. RitaFire

    Trying to learn...

    You certainly bring up some good points NYCindie; things I need to think about. But I am going to disagree partially with this statement: I don't agree that if I am involved with someone who is open, honest, in a poly relationship with their partner would necessarily be more available to me...
  11. RitaFire

    Trying to learn...

    Sometimes I feel conflicted as far as getting involved with someone who is cheating. Likely my conflict is clouded by my infatuation, and my brain rationalizes it as being okay. I felt some resentment towards Rob for not wanting me to become involved with someone who I cared deeply for...
  12. RitaFire

    Too Many Bad Examples

    I feel that I need to clarify this paragraph: When Rob read this post last night, I could tell that he was frustrated. I asked what was wrong. He said that paragraph made it sound like I never wanted to try polyamory. That is not what I was saying here. What I was saying is that I did not want...
  13. RitaFire

    Too Many Bad Examples

    It's too bad with this most recent guy. We had only met about a week ago and are getting along really well. I admired his passion and his artistic talents. He made me laugh. The flirting and sexual tension was fun. But he confronted me yesterday asking where this was going, he wanted to take...
  14. RitaFire

    Trying to learn...

    I think you really hit it there, Penny. I had some positive feelings during the experience, like NRE with the man I was considering becoming involved with. But the other negative feelings overwhelmed me. I read your story here. I was wondering if your husband has found someone yet. If so, has...
  15. RitaFire

    Trying to learn...

    Ha! We both responded at the same time. lol.
  16. RitaFire

    Trying to learn...

    We have been trying to do more spontaneous things together. Taking short trips, for example. I do have interests that do not directly involve my husband, which he is completely supportive of. I have also found some new friends through my interests. These interests and my friends have been a...
  17. RitaFire

    Trying to learn...

    Thank you both for your comments and insights. The thing is, he feels wronged, by the whole situation we experienced, by me jumping into it thinking I was ready, but really was not. He said when we got into it that we would quit at any time either one of us wanted to. When we did quit, it was...
  18. RitaFire

    Trying to learn...

    My husband had been talking to me about polyamory for a few years. He was not trying to push me into it, but he did discuss it with me. I had been unsure about how I felt about it. I always thought of marriage as a commitment between two people. I knew people with open marriages, and it seemed...
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