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two rings same finger You're right, it's about the significance of the symbol and the placement of it. Seems you are uneasy about it by saying that "it wouldn't replace our wedding ring". (much appreciated Marcus' query about how OSO feels about the current ring) Perhaps you can be grateful...

Independent love song Not sure if it's a great wedding song; could be... I discovered it from the movie Bed of Roses but after really getting into the lyrics don't think it was a true fit for the 'classic romantic chick flick'. 'Independent Love Song' by Scarlet...

different meds? Hi DeJaye, You're situation sucks! So sorry you're having to live through all that. First off: what does your doctor say about you episodes even though you're on meds to help that? Have they suggested other med options? I used to listen to the Pedestrian Polyamory podcast...

One of my previous bff's (who ironically is no longer due to her not agreeing with my poly lifestyle) once said she chooses to be with someone but does not need to be with someone. Wishes of happiness and health to you; Your writing is very helpful & inspriational.

going fwd Hi adarkwolf, Noticed many reads but no replys to your thread; know that there's usually a lot going on all over the forum so posts sometimes get passed by. Hopefully one of the long timers will chime in soon, they so often have such helpful hints and experiences to share. Imagine...

Best of luck to all of your Quad + 1! Sounds like a lot of love:) My Other Husband has told me more than once: "Difficult things (situations) often reap the best rewards". That seems to go with Dr. David Schnarch's Passionate Marriage where he said, "People often need to feel discomfort to...

Graviton, cannot even begin to imagine how devasting something like that can feel. I wish there were words that could convey the heartfelt feelings of sympathy I have for you during this difficult time. There are many words swirling around in my mind of what could be helpful hints to try and...

Rereading your last post, now understanding that perhaps you've been encouraged to be a "full" parent to the other children, but are finding it too painful, with the probability/possibility of never having your own biological child to add? It's obviously very painful. I wish I could offer a...

Why aren't you also a parent? GSA, Huge sympathies for your loss. I too had a miscarriage, though much earlier in the pregnancy. Until one actually lives through anything like that they really have no idea how awful it can feel. I would never presume to know how much harder it's been for...

The fact that you recognize another great person, their strengths and weaknesses, is what makes you so great! That you want to follow your heart in every way possible, but also don't want to hurt anyone else, is what makes you special. I would imagine that is what both Ruth and Esther find...

Time heals You will probably have to give Nathan time... from your NRE perspective, lots of time. My guess is he needs to assimilate his new "open" relationship. Even if he knows intellectually that Ruth isn't leaving him, his emotions tell him differently. Plus now, he also has the hurt of...

It was probably a surprise to you both You could be my husband posting! He felt (& sometimes may still feel) the exact same way. So sorry to hear those feelings are still prevalent, because, of course, you're right. The relationship is not what you envisioned when you married and is now...

House title/bank paperwork/two names only Believe it was in the book 'Opening Up' where it was mentioned that most banks' loan paperwork only has space/lines to sign of two owners. As stated above they don't care where the money comes from but the legal ownership will on be under the two who...

Thank you for posting this quandry as I've combed over this site for the better part of a week trying to find someone going through a similar challenge. For me it's not so much that I don't love my husband, I know in my mind I love him and I fight to feel it in my heart. It must be also in my...