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I think I'm confused. I thought the problem was that people are ending relationships when you think they should be available to talk through the problems and find other solutions. But in your last post, you indicate that the problem (which must be stopped) is that people don't talk enough about...

I agree with what's been mentioned above-- sometimes people just decide that they don't want to pursue a relationship, and will try to use the simplest explanation they can, boiling the "global incompatibility" they're feeling down to just one thing (I'm really busy at work, or I don't see this...

I agree that the rule is unreasonable, and sounds more like a rule for swinging than for poly. It's one thing to ask for notice if someone thinks that a relationship might be moving in the direction of sex (as in, this person may become more than a friend), but to ask for that level of notice is...

So maybe it's a complete coincidence, but a lot of folks who practice RA also identify as anarchists in other facets of their lives. Examine the rules you follow, the rules you might impose on others, and determine for yourself whether they really support your values. Question authority...

Well okay, the officers and directors owe a fiduciary duty to shareholders. Delaware law controls the majority of American corporations, and Delaware imposes a duty of care and loyalty on directors, to protect the investments of shareholders (most other states impose something similar). When...

While I may not agree with everything AnarchistwithoutAdjective is saying, I do agree that not everyone wins with the iPhone-- only the wealthy elite (American middle class is incredibly wealthy compared to the rest of the world). The phones are manufactured in abysmal working conditions. The...

Privilege is usually the sort of thing that exists regardless of someone's intention to avoid the negative consequences that fall on someone without privilege. I can be very passionate about fighting racism, actively engaged in being an ally to people of color, but I'm still white, and I still...

Yeah, but lots of homosexuals have had and are having babies. Only in the last half century have gays had social freedom to live with partners and not enter hetero marriage, and lesbians have skills with turkey basters. I'm actually bi, and only now looking to get pregnant since I entered a...

This thread really highlights how different people have different ideas about parenting. Personally, I'm actively trying to get pregnant. I'm a lesbian in my late 30s, relying in donated sperm (which brings a new perspective to DNA), and recognizing that my age might impair my ability to...

A lot of good advice already. My two cents-- it's possible that there may not be any magic words that will convince him to be okay with what you want. He may just not be able to get there. If he can get to where he's not okay, but will begrudgingly agree to not stand in your way, is that...

Wow, given the way you talk about your wife, I think you should end the marriage. How awful it must be for her to be married to you! Be kind. Leave.

Ugh. It's possible that you are physically turned off because emotionally, you know things are over. That happened to me. You can rationalize it by how healthy yoyr body feels, and how germy he seems, but maybe your body is just telling you what your heart already knows. Don't drag it out.

In my experience, Unicorn Hunters are seeking a myth-- a hot bi babe who gives them a fun time together, who is great to hang out with, thinks they're both (equally) amazing, doesn't mind house chores, provides free baby-sitting, has no life plan of her own so she melds perfectly into their...

A lot of times when people are looking for advice, it's easy to try to figure out whose fault it is, and start from that perspective. Here, what you describe, nobody is at fault. You both sound like good people, doing your best. And it does sound like you're at the end of something. He's not...

Rather than just piling on to the OP (who likely deserves it, but no point in repeating what's already been said), I would like to point out that a *lot* of people come here with unrealistic fantasies about how poly might work for them, struggling with how reality differs. For example-- "We're...

It does sound like you're finding yourself attracted to women who might be easier to manipulate (half your age, dowdy, smaller social networks). What happens when they grow up? I'm also not sure that finding wives 3 and 4 will be that easy. There are a lot of guys searching and searching for...

This site actually has the best (as far as I've found) group of folks who are interested in thoughtful discussions about poly. Those were some weird responses you got to that other post-- not sure where that came from.

Wow, what happens if you and the local (fake wedding) wife die? And her family is convinced that the marriage was real, and gets in a legal battle with the immigrant wife? You wil have made things far worse for her by faking the marriage to the local partner. Bottom line-- talk to a lawyer...

Is it possible that you know exactly how you feel and what you want, but you're judging yourself harshly for it? Divorce carries a lot of cultural baggage.

This thing where you keep changing your mind about breaking up with her-- that's incredibly cruel. It's mean. It's callous. It's the worst thing about this story. It makes you sound like the narcicisst, not her. It makes me worry that you are going to be in and out of this kid's life, depending...