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I love the Scarleteen website, and send my kids (and other youngsters I know and care about) to Scarleteen.com for spot-on advice and education about sex and relationships. In fact, I just this week reminded two of my teens to spend some time browsing the site Today I saw that they have a...

The pink and red heart chocolates come after the red and green santas, but before the pastel egg-and-bunny ones, right?

I count ours as successful, having continued past divorce. Woof (former spouse - married 18 years when divorced, together now for 24) is poly but without other partners. Mitch is probably philosophically poly, but hasn’t bothered to seek. I have kids with both, am “resident” in separate homes...

49 other states, I think. Moving is drastic, but maybe fits with other plans sometime in the future? I seem to recall that one possibility was taking an extended vacation to a state which requires a short residency before its courts can have jurisdiction in an uncomplicated divorce. But I...

What makes it work? The same things as having only one partner - familiarity, trust, shared experience, choosing to be family to each other. It may be logistically harder to do without cohabitation and/or closed geometries, but for some of us it’s emotionally/socially possible only by...

Sex need and ability can change a lot over a life time. It sounds like you know that, and know that isn’t the real problem here. The major problem is not being able to talk about the intimacy famine, and the growing sense that you can’t express your feelings and needs. This needs to be addressed...

Similar enough that it sounds very familiar! It shouldn’t be too hard to get unmarried, though you may legally have to attest to living apart or other proofs of separation. It’ll cost an attorney’s help, but it was worth it for us. The scariest part was realizing the judge could recommend some...

Warm hugs from here. That sounds overwhelming. And yet you find positive points to cling to. Stay awesome.

I never figured on hiding anything about polyamory from my kids. At some point, years ago, it was new to the older ones, and their reactions to having their questions answered in age-appropriate and privacy-respecting ways ranged from "Weird." to "Makes sense." and we all just moved on from...

No. I didn’t suggest that anyone’s consent is required to apply the poly trait label to a person. I suggested that since you define poly relationships in a way that includes consent, it makes sense to define the poly trait as being inclined and/or able to participate in poly relationships as...

Poly relationships *may* have ethical rules? But you included ethics in your "second tier" definition. So, why define polyamorous relationships in terms of ethics (as vastly most definitions do), and then not define ployamory the trait with the same constraint? Like this: The ability to have...

^^ Every word of this, over and over, forever and ever, Amen.

Bluebird, for the record, I think you're being eminently reasonable about this. You obviously care about the health of everyone in the group, and you obviously aren't coercing anyone. I also appreciate your clear-eyed view against stigmatizing HSV status. It's not so helpful to me when someone...

Hmm. It sounds like going at the pace of DarkKnight and PunkRock's comfort is a reasonable approach. Do you feel like the 6 months probation before bareback is a plan you must have set in stone before you embark on it? Do you need to know the definite next step now? Can the six months be an...

Mitch and Woof have met a few times. They aren't much alike, and aren't interested in friendship. They don't maintain any kind of contact, as they don't live near each other, and I handle all of the scheduling. They can contact each other in an emergency. If, for some reason, Mitch is in...

The woman herself should decide, based on her own desire to not become pregnant or bear (more) children. I can think of no reason anyone should veto this decision, or pressure a woman one way or another. A permanent method of birth control is only superior to other methods if you no longer want...

I suppose if you needed someone to write all that stuff you say I wrote, you've done so now. I'll let what I actually wrote speak for me, and I won't bother to read any more of your trolling.

"It kinda looks like..." here seems to mean "Without evidence, I want to accuse you of..." Privilege doesn't cease to exist when you wish it weren't there, or when you only use as much of it as you really need. Taking advantage of privilege isn't even always a conscious act. You are the one...

Nonsensical? Getting married is the official way to claim legal couple privilege and the traditional and most ironclad way to claim social couple privilege (except perhaps in the case of a marriage kept secret). Therefore, those who do get married are embracing couple privilege. I suppose they...

This sounds *so* delicious.