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Sorry, didn't include a whole lot of detail there. We both decided the best thing would be to put the sexual/sleepover component of our relationship on hold, but we've still been very close throughout, and my gf knows it. It is not an indefinite hold, and I have every intention of resuming, even...

My girlfriend has had a hard time coping with my being polyamorous. She was ok with it at the start of our relationship (1.5 yrs ago), when she was not exactly "primary" with me, but then once I moved in with her (few months ago), she became very much not ok with it. The one night I spent away...

Thank you for your feedback. As I've said, my GF is the one acquiring the loan and it will legally be her house. My name is not on the loan or title and I'm ok with that. I am assisting with a down payment, and I don't expect repayment of that money. We have had multiple discussions on the...

Exactly, and she is to an extent (reluctant). And I'm respecting that. The issue is more of my GF respecting my needs and freedom, and being ok with it...working through her own jealousy.

This is not something we did before and not an issue for me.

Eh, I don't know, probably not as far as full-time living goes. But I'd much rather live with her, too, unless we're having issues (such as over this) when I'd like to have a different place to crash. sigh.

I know the whole "moving out-moving in" thing happened quickly, but yes...it was a financial necessity. I am the bread winner, and I am financially supporting my wife and child for the most part (80%). So in order to let them stay in our house, I had to move out but I couldn't afford a place on...

I really needed to read what you wrote and thank you so much. All of what you said is very applicable and true. May have to keep referring back to it.. :o

Thanks for your input...I feel she's being unfair as well. She went from not having nearly as much as my wife (we started off with 1 sleepover a week), to having way more than my wife (I now live with her!), and she's still not happy. I feel like I'm stuck once again with having to make a...

Her feelings seem very strong to me. She's gotten mad at me sometimes when I even bring up my ex's name, which I try not to do anymore. She may be willing to grit her teeth and bear it, but I do stand the risk of losing her which would be awful. I do think she and I are more compatible, but I...

A while back I posted that I had a wife and a gf (I am also a woman), but I was feeling much more compatible with my gf and not happy in my home life, especially as a daily parent to my son with my wife. Most people commented that it seemed like I wanted to leave/get a divorce. Some time went...

Update on my situation. I've gone to a counseling appointment and have another today. It helped to get this out, and the counselor basically said similar things that you all have. Honestly, it was really hard reading your responses the first time, but when I went back to them later, it wasn't...

This is true, but I wonder if just because I don't have that connection anymore, that I should leave her. I do love her and we have good times together, things just don't feel very romantic these days. As someone else commented, sometimes the kindest thing you can do for another person is to let...

I think I would be able to deal with co-primary relationships, but as my wife keeps telling me she wants more time with me, I don't think it will work for her. I told her last night that she needs to work on finding out what she needs to be happy, and not sell herself short. And when I say...

OP again. All of the responses are valid and I thank you. I do find it interesting that people are leaning towards me not actually being poly, and advocating that I want a divorce. I'm not so sure... Even when I am happily with a partner, I have always wanted the freedom to connect with...

OP here back to address a few things... Being with my wife non-monogamously worked for a while. And being with her polyamorous-ly also worked for a while. When I first started seeing my gf, I felt just as in love and connected to my wife as I did with gf. I was very happy with both. But then as...

Thank you for your reply, and the kind things you said about my being a parent. It does come down to your statement above, but I have such enormous guilt over my wife having been so amenable to my wishes, and then basically turning around and saying I don't want to be with her like that anymore...

I am a mid-30's lesbian and have been with my wife for coming up on 13 years. For 10 years we were monogamous, but 3 years ago I decided that I could no longer deny, repress or ignore the fact that I am polyamorous (which for so long wasn't an issue because I was happily mono with my wife, but...