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What Emm said. Chill dude

Hey there girl. I totally hear you. I'm sorry you're struggling, I get you believe me. About three years go I was in a very similar situation, and I chose wrong =( Three years ago I was living overseas with my then partner of 4.5 years. Best boyfriend I've ever had. So sweet, treated me super...

I love Qarzan's message. I thought it was really insightful and wise. Acceptance of what it is, of who we are and who the people we love are is a powerful thing. Thanks, your words helped me too.

Hello GalaGirl. Thank you so much for your tips. I do have friends here, I am staying at my friends' house at the moment and they are trying to be supportive, but they are mono and don't really get the whole poly thing, I feel a little judgment whenever I try to talk about what happened and it...

So I left. I came back home to clear my head and think if I can give him another chance or not, to see if I can trust him again. I am so sad. And miss him at the same time. I have cried so much and really don't know what to do with myself. Can't seem to be able to sleep. I keep binge-watching...

It most definitely feels exactly like that. Anyways, I'm going back home tomorrow. I already packed my things. I am so incredibly sad, feel so cheated. Thank you all!

Hello there. I'm sorry that you are going through a difficult time. I believe you have to see this as an opportunity to think, defy and redefine what you think about romantic relationships. Is monogamy important to you? If so, why? Do you think is possible to care and have a romantic connection...

Hello Kevin. Thanks for your reply. To answer your questions, before this, yes I would've said I trusted him so much. Personally, I've never been as honest with anyone before, not just ex boyfriends, but anyone in my life, I shared with him things I've never told before. I was very direct and...

Just as a general kind of update. I know he's behavior is abusive and hurtful. Trust me I know. I'm really upset and so sad. But I also want to say he has good things. People are complex, have good and bad and act in certain ways for a variety of psychological reasons. There's some things I...

That's an interesting exercise. I'll give it a go. I agree is a red flag. It saddens me so. =( I have heard it from her, yes. At the very beginning, her and I sat down to talk a few times, to get to know each other better. She mentioned this on her own and explained that this was really hard...

True. I'm so disappointed and kinda heartbroken. I think I'm still giving him the chance to actually apologize properly and make amends.

I understand why your mind went there, but no, it wasn't him. We got mugged on a bus with a bunch of people. They took his camera.

Thanks for your words of wisdom Magdlyn. I actually read all the links you suggested. Of all the things, what I completely didn't know about is the triangulating behavior. Since I'm new to polyamory, I didn't even know of the concept. It makes sense, and reading what it is, it helps me...

GalaGirl, thanks so much. What a great post. I mean it. I think you summed it up perfectly: having the talk match the walk. It did sting going to get tested because of this situation. I was so upset that day. That's an interesting point. I'll think more about that to see if I can pinpoint...

Well put, Ravenscroft. You raise a valid point. You are making me really think about what's my limit here? Thanks a lot.

Thanks for your words. I agree that open communication and truth should be the foundations. And thanks for commenting on the snooping hehe. I haven't touched his phone or other devices since, and I don't want to. But also I asked him if there were any other girls that I should know about, I said...

Thanks Vinsanity. Is good to hear that I'm not over-reacting. I'm new to polyamory and sometimes it can get confusing when your partner says otherwise. And I also agree that he's deflecting and not recognizing nor validating my feelings. Fair point.

Starlight, thank you so much for your understanding and well-explained answer. Thanks for validating my feelings and helping me see I'm not being naive. To be honest, my first gut reaction, in my mind, was "It's over. Done." I do feel like he crossed a line, that, I thought because we talked...

Amac and Anamikanon... he did lie to the other GF too. But she found out through him, because when I discovered the lie, he took some "preventive" actions and called her to say that I had found this out and that he "didn't wanna lie to her" so that's why she was telling her now. But no, she...

Hello everybody! I'm new to this forum, so I hope I'm posting this thread correctly :p For a little over a year, I've been in a poly relationship (my first). I met this fascinating man who has a girlfriend, and he explained they have an open relationship. So after I while I became his...