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I agree with GalaGirl on the need to know basis. Some great advice I've gotten around sharing in poly with one partner about another is they don't necessarily need to know everything. At times, sharing, especially with regard to conflicts, a third party (i.e. Friend, counsellor, family member)...

I would wear a button that read "Polyamorous: Visibility is Strength" :)

Hi weatherwax, You might want to remind yourself when you get insecure about being a placeholder that poly can offer your relationship something special. It would be too much pressure on you to meet every single one of your partner's needs. By being open, your partner can gets some needs met...

Traditional gender roles when it comes to boys and men are so damaging. When boys cry, they are often shunned or teased by their peers. Even worse, parents discourage outward expressions of both sadness and affection. Social cues are everywhere and because of this we often do not question or...

I agree with GalaGirl, I think dialing it back is a good idea by bringing up being a secondary partner. This gives you some power back, as in being in control of how much you invest (time, energy, planning, etc.). Also, maybe your partners need to hear how this has been for you so far to make...

If you are happy, perhaps you don't need to do anything around disclosing. It sounds like there would be major upheaval if you all came out poly, but maybe hiding is becoming too much as well?

As you have read on here already, most people have and will come into a relationship involving mental health issues at some point in life. This means your mental state is personal, yet one which many can relate to themselves. I am glad to hear you are coming out of this depressive time you've...

Love this metaphor! Especially about not committing to soccer, then the argument that basketball is also very difficult! Well played.

I also had to stop watching the documentary, but then returned to finish the rest. The content is hard to consume since the topics around assault come into play towards the second half. However, it is worth feeling uncomfortable and even frightened of the connection between masculinity and...

Hi PurpleSun, I would use a queer space on the forum. And that is my favourite RuPaul quote, apart from "If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?". Thanks for posting!

If that's the worst, that is kinda awesome! :)

Coming out as poly has been slow for me. I consider my close friends like family, so I have only just started to come out with close friends who are open-minded. The responses have been positive so far. Always try to stay hopeful!

The co-worker boyfriend sounds as if he got cold feet about poly or when the situation became real (i.e. my girlfriend is going to want to sleep with new people) he became possessive. I agree with those who said to move on and be clear with what you want from new lovers right from the start.

I know people who need time to process issues that arise before they are ready to talk. It gives them time to think and know how they really feel about whatever the problem is. I, however, like to get problems out of the way (and my headspace) as soon as possible. So, consider the...

Please do remember that your safety and mental health are the most important pieces here. The violence and assault are not your fault. I agree with the others, do not see this person again. You deserve safety and kindness.

Hello, I agree with kdt26417 when it comes to the emotional vs. sex issues that can arise with a partner being involved with a FWB situation. The sex might bother you more because it seems somehow less connected than if emotional pieces were in place. Sometimes a FWB is also less established...

Hello PetiteFemme, I am a Genderfluid female myself and new to the forum. It was nice to see someone else also identifying as non-binary. I have just started coming out to close friends, and truly to myself, as being poly. Give yourself time and be true to yourself going forward about what to...

I think curiosity is a great motivator and that it is also wise to learn as much as possible before making any moves toward a new relationship. I am new and here to learn too.

Time and experience with poly dating might be the only way to find out how deep your insecurities run. Don't rush into anything you are not ready for, especially without a lot of communicating with your partner.

So sorry for your loss and the grief you are working through.