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  1. M

    Also new to poly

    he broke up with me tonight - i'm done - i give up.
  2. M

    Also new to poly

    ok..so i asked if i was specifically excluded - the answer was no - and he did explain some thing to me, and i reiterated how exclusion makes me crazy - so i did the communication thing - scary but i did it.
  3. M

    Also new to poly

    well he's made time for me, so that is progress. Right now i'm hormonally compromised - but i know my reactions aren't just due to that - i thinik i need to write more and figure out what i want and need .
  4. M

    Also new to poly

    yes - it's trust ...or not - no in between -
  5. M

    Also new to poly

    quite honestly - i'm not sure either - i dont' know if it's GF1 and GF2 or just GF1 - but it looks unlikely i'll have time with him this week like last - and i'm really honest to god trying to understand...and believe him when he says he's not avoiding me - but fuck - it's like i don't even...
  6. M

    Also new to poly

    i don't understand - i start talking about plans that friends are talking about for the holiday - and i get "well, WE are doing this..." and i wasn't part of the "we" excluded once again - what the fuck? am i overreacting? i really was getting to wear i was willing to just take things one day...
  7. M

    Also new to poly

    yes exactly...down to 25 mph - i can blame his work - i don't want to be rational at the moment i had a lousy day at work, i needed someone to tell me that i'm wonderful and loved - and i didn't get any of that - i get he's putting in like 13 hour days, i really do - and i don't want to seem...
  8. M

    Also new to poly

    i'm having a rough day - being the third in a quad sucks right now. Not only do i feel excluded, i feel ignored - i'm lonely, i'm hurt, and and i'm really pissed off. mari
  9. M

    Bdsm

    "breath play" is definitely edge play and really not to be done by people who don't know what their doing. So i would really do some communicating about your concerns, because you're right, it can be very dangerous. Keep in mind, even though it's scary to see and think about - this was done with...
  10. M

    Outed!

    luckily we (well my BF and GF1 and me) are involved in another alternative lifetyle as well - but since i've only been on the scene with them the last couple of months - we still odd looks from some of our friends - especially when like GF1 and me will be at one event with him and GF2 and GF1...
  11. M

    After Lack

    going to make that a new affirmation - gotta trust the Universe - i asked for happiness and it brought me to them - it's when the mind starts going and the fears start rifling through my brain that i forget - i create my own happiness, and it brought me to them :) mari
  12. M

    Fears of loss in a mono/poly relationship

    I actually have a huge fear of loss, in general, but particularly in this new quad relationship. While he and I have known each other for years, this is a much different interaction. And since I'm the newest on the scene, I feel the most "disposable," for lack of a better word, the person who's...
  13. M

    After Lack

    You know, i really needed to be reminded of that today. I decided not so very long ago that i was doneabsolutely done with being unhappy - and amazing things started opening up in my life - mari
  14. M

    Also new to poly

    silly question - i'm all about the communication - but i'm so bad at it - i'm afraid i guess -afraid of being so vulnerable - i know the others have more pressing needs at this time and i get that in my head - it's the internal self talk that is really not helping - also i think i'm trying to...
  15. M

    After Lack

    i am fascinated by this piece of your post " I can then intervene, if I catch myself at this silly making-myself-unhappy game" that's exactly what i am trying to figure out how to do. because i, not my relationship, am making me unhappy. it's the internal self talk that is driving me...
  16. M

    hi

    i'm new here too - and basically trying to find my way in this new path i've started walking. i'm the third GF in a quad, and it's a new relationship (less than 2 months) and the shiny has rubbed off, and i'm a bit perplexed about some of the emotions that are running over me. i talked more...
  17. M

    Also new to poly

    i'm very new to poly, in a quad, and the newest on the scene. The first month or so was awesome - real life kicked in after that and basically the "shiny" wore off. i find that i'm envious, feeling a bit taken for granted, and feel like i'm waiting around for whatever time is left over for me...
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