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    Objectification (sexual, etc.)

    Hey! Great that you are raising this topic. I am also bi but I do not circulate in the LGBTQI+ community where I live exactly because we have no shared values (I think as a woman it is a bit different, I guess). I believe this objectification is a part of capitalism and pinkwashing very...
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    mono/poly

    Sorry to put it so but reading this just drove me crazy... Your husband's behaviour to you is unacceptable. From everything you have written, I never saw you and your needs in this relationship considered by him. Like... where was he when you were going out of the room and crying? Why did you...
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    Dating & Sex

    Congrats! People deserve to have good sex once in a while, damn it! Still, you had yahtzee (phaha, your joke with the video is good) in the family house, I guess? Does his wife live there? Did you see her stuff, did you two talk about that? I mean, you don't need to straight away but...
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    Dating & Sex

    Hey! I would hate to be a killjoy but beware. To me, the most important would be - does this wife of his live with him, does she know about you? Make sure she does, I would say. Because you are hyped up, I can literally see and recognize myself when I get enthusiastic about someone in what you...
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    Narcissism and kink vs ethical poly

    I really agree with what all of you say, that's why this is indeed my favorite forum. Because to be poly and to be good kinky, and be ethical on top of that makes you a very hard working person, doing a lot of inner work and caring about others, I believe! Ugh, when I wrote this thread, I...
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    Narcissism and kink vs ethical poly

    Just so many resources on narcs say how they are "kinky af", sex is lustful etc. Probably that's not true. I have no idea. It's just when people say after abuse "you need to know what healthy sex looks like", I am like... well, what do you mean? Healthy as in not kinky? Anyways, I decided...
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    Narcissism and kink vs ethical poly

    Hey, people! I wanted to open this topic up here, excuse me if it already exists (would be happy to get the link of a thread about it). I am recently recovering from a narcissistic relationship and sexual abuse. It is a very complicated journey for me and it is hard to articulate the problem...
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    Too "woke"?

    I completely agree with your opinion about the situation. You are expressing it very kindly, also. Joseph has decided what his boundary is. Basically the guys have decided what works for them and for their friendship. Of course their friendship is more important than a potential relationship...
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    Incarceration and polyamory?

    I will speak from experience here. I dated a person in prison for 2 years and what I can say is, sorry for the imperative but - DO NOT SELF-SACRIFICE. I did this sleep-with-others-while-he-is-in. It did not work out. The moment there was another guy I was sleeping with, it turned into this huge...
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    I think I am causing everyone pain

    Well, if he really wanted to be with me, he would have stayed and worked it through. What he did is humiliate me, escape and then suggest what I had suggested for us before - doing therapy together etc. So really fuck him! These days I started recalling some really petty fights (when things...
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    I think I am causing everyone pain

    He wrote to a friend that he is trying to go to therapy in the States, hoping he can come back and go to therapy together and save our relationship. That he panicked because of his trauma and now he cannot tell me because I blocked him everywhere. AHAHHAHAHAHA, nice one, Mr. Hoover! Seriously...
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    I think I am causing everyone pain

    I'm sitting here, finally in my own place. He finally left and he left a mess. I was cleaning the house all day, not being able to believe that this is over, wow. He left telling me that he did not want to go but he had no choice, I made him. God damn right I did! I am super grateful it is over...
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    I think I am causing everyone pain

    Because the marriage agreement would make the assessment of who has what property more expensive, I dropped the offer. A couple of days ago when I was crying that I don't have the money for divorce and I need to probably sell my body to have it, he told me he will pay for it. That he wants...
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    I think I am causing everyone pain

    Last night was the first night when I actually slept more than a couple of hours. There were 3 days of me not sleeping and chain smoking. Just waves of cold, like the cold when it's not cold around but you feel it. Shaking. Anxiety. Anger. Pain. Yesterday I tried my wedding suit on and it was...
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    Need some help from a monogamous point of view.

    Do you mind some clarifying questions? How did she break up with you? She admitted that she was cheating on you and called it off? Were you in a strictly monogamous relationship? You are saying she expressed a desire to be with people, did you say that't ok and lied so you could be together...
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    I think I am causing everyone pain

    I wrote to his ex that he allegedly broke up with because of me. I regretted it later and deleted the message but she had read it and she responded. She told me that's all he likes to do in general, going from person to person. That it was all how much he loves her when they were breaking up...
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    Contraceptive advise

    Iub Hello! I have the Intrauterine ball, a copper thing inside my uterus for a month now and I am super ok with it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkX6N0GwnSg I am not ok with taking hormones and also the T-shaped IUD pokes stuff inside you and could be more painful. The IUB is spherical...
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    I think I am causing everyone pain

    I really wished he would realize how much I love him and hold onto him and want me back (yeah, because I love him, not because he loves me. He wants to be loved more, I believe.)... I cannot believe how pathetic I am. I still have these thoughts, even when I believe he is not a good person. I...
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    I think I am causing everyone pain

    Wow, I took another chance. He fucked with my head... I thought fuck, maybe he doesn't understand how much I love him because of his low self-esteem. I called him up and literally begged him, like if he loves me to work through this, go see a therapist with me. I talked on the phone with him...
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    I think I am causing everyone pain

    I'm not afraid or distressed about that. There is security around the buildings and cameras, so nothing fatal can happen. Also, since he wants to keep me for later obviously, he knows it would be a bad move, he is smart. There is nothing he could possibly do to the apartment that would be...
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