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Myself being a mono husband and my wife desiring to be poly, the question I keep asking myself is this: 'How would her being polyamorous deepen... strengthen... empower... or otherwise just generally improve our marital relationship?' So far as I can tell, it doesn't. Yes, it might help her...

Can we please stop discussing these things? This information is now available publicly without my consent.

I am respectfully requesting the assistance of a moderator: @Evie, @kdt26417, @Petunia, @icesong I was brand new and trying to get away from the Reddit trolls. I simply did not know either that a) everything written here in the forum was directly accessible to the public nor that b) I couldn't...

It's become clear this morning that this conversation has run its course and any further discussion will be less than productive. So, let me sincerely thank everyone for the gracious investment of their time and energy, then bid you adieu.

One of my life philosophies is to not leave important things left unsaid. So, no, I don't just ignore things when I disagree with people. You keep projecting what you think is going on in my inner-world rather than asking questions, and it's rather annoying.

I would distinguish between self-sacrificial (good) and sacrificing yourself (bad).

FYI - From this point forward, I'm ignoring any posts that mention divorce. I've made clear numerous times that's not on the table for either of us and we're both explicitly, 1,000% committed to this marriage but that keeps being ignored. So, I'm now ignoring the comments of those who are...

Cool. Thanks. So it's chiefly a historical thing? It's about what was first and what was unique? I knew I'd have trouble with the word choice of "special." That's why I considered alternatives like "distinctive", "unique", or "set apart." I even thought of using "sacred." None of these words...

Dads go through that, too. Especially a parent who is a stay-at-home dad.

The list of questions keeps being brought up--critically--to let's address that one head-on. First of all, I've already written at-length about how "Wonda" is fantastic at analyzing but is pretty terrible at brainstorming. She cannot just sit down and start creatively imagining possibilities...

One more question before bed... This weekend "Wonda" talked to me about co-dependency. To translate it into the language I'm encountering on this site, it really seems like she feels we're too "entangled" in our marital relationship. To be honest, I'm really confused by this. Here are the facts...

A quick two-fold question: For those who were in monogamous marriages that transitioned into polyamory, I'm trying to understand a) how the marital relationship is still special and b) why is it better to be married than not?

FYI - I haven't suddenly run away. Just having a busy weekend. Well, not so much in terms of activities but wif... "Wonda"... is feeling exhausted/sick from fibromyalgia fun flairing up and baby is being particularly fussy, so I'm on-call pretty much 24/7 as their caregiver. Hopefully I'll be...

New here. Didn't know that was a possibility and/or didn't think of it. Nevertheless, I'll just lean into the continuing apology. Sorry. I didn't want to separate it out because I thought it helped provided greater context. Nevertheless, I'll just lean into the continuing apology. Sorry. I see...

Yes, I would say that's an extremely autonomous view. I'm not saying it's right or wrong, good or bad, healthy or unhealthy. It's just an extremely autonomous approach. Personally, I see it as a two-fold thing. In no particular order, for me it's about both the speech-act (in the form of vows)...

First of all, I screwed up. I thought that Shelley quote was a response to me and not your permanent quote at the end of every post. Just plain misread that. Sorry about that. That being said... OK. Yes, I've read Sex at Dawn. Have you also read the scholarly critiques of Sex at Dawn? I would...

Sure. Why not? Wonda it is.

Magdlyn offered this quote: "Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve." - Shelley I think liberty is important...

OK. Perhaps some context is needed. I need to be careful to not to disclose where exactly, but in the part of the country where I live both major segments of the ethical non-monogamous community (i.e. swingers and poly) tend to have a strong libertarian streak. So I think there's a regional...

Fair enough. I'm more than open to revising my perception. Gotcha. Actually, that sounds intriguing for me... lol Interesting. Understood. Agreed. And, on my end, it's all good for us to have that disagreement. Right I'm I'm intentionally leaning even heavier into curiosity to just...