Search results

Thank you for your willingness to help. I believe the term "hierarchy" needs more nuance, or individualization, than your response suggests. I am not currently a secondary, nor will I ever be a secondary. That term seems pejorative and calculated to hurt. Regardless of your level of experience...

Thank you, Kevin! I so deeply appreciate your compassionate and direct answer to my question. Enforcing a boundary like that is a tough one. I am grateful to you for reminding me to check in with myself about what I can and cannot handle, and what boundaries need my attention.

Thank you so much for this thoughtful reply! You're pretty spot on in most of what you're saying, and a lot of your advice is helpful! I have tried talking to Sam about this a couple of times, but I haven't been able to do it in a way that makes me feel like I'm being clear to either of us. I...

I'll do that, thank you!

That's a fair point. Hopefully he's willing to find some common ground with me. I guess I have to think about what to do if he won't, but I would rather cross that bridge when I get to it and try to stay optimistic and give him the benefit of the doubt until then.

She could, but it's still Sam's responsibility to communicate that need to her. I don't believe that this is how things will be, full stop. I think it has more to do with him not really understanding his habits and how they affect me, along with how consistent they are with a hierarchical...

I met Sarah at a kink event, we played a few times and hung out, and she thought Sam and I would like each other, so she introduced us. He wasn't feeling jealous or left out, he's just more of an introvert and didn't really go anywhere aside from work and out with Sarah. He doesn't actively...

[Edited to break this up into paragraphs and add a little extra information] Hello friends, I'm in a lovely relationship with a man (we'll call him Sam) who has been married to his wife (we'll call her Sarah) for twelve years. Sam and I have been dating since November, but we first met about 6...