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  1. R

    What are the downsides of being poly?

    I can say this in all honesty, for me, once I came to terms with being poly, it has been as easy as breathing. For me, there are no new, additional downsides. Time management is my life struggle, as I work multiple jobs and will going back to school full time and working in the fall. I feel...
  2. R

    Dating...

    I had virtually no dating experience prior to deciding to explore being poly. At that point I had been with my husband for 4.5 years and married for two. I met someone on OKC. We messaged back and forth for awhile, and then met in person. We clicked really well and decided to get together...
  3. R

    OKC in the house?

    I really enjoyed was reading the OKC blog. I'm a math geek, so my opinion might not be shared, but I loved their discussion of what works in profiles and messages and what doesn't. As I had never tried online dating before, it seemed useful. I find myself far more likely to message or...
  4. R

    Extroversion, Introversion & Ambiversion

    I'm an extrovert, but I can be shy in group situations where I don't understand the social dynamic or feel actively not a part of the group.
  5. R

    Success stories?

    Honestly, for me, once I accepted that I was poly, and told my husband, everything else has been incredibly easy. It took him a couple of months to process his emotions, and then I started looking to date. Within a month, I had been a couple of dates and met someone special. We've been...
  6. R

    Why and how did you get into poly?

    I'm sort of in the middle between the two potentials you suggested. There were several people that I had interested in throughout my relationship with my husband, but I didn't decide that I was poly to pursue one of them. I ended up with someone I met online once I started looking.
  7. R

    Dealing with unexpected pregnancy

    The 12 to 15 % failure rate is with typical use, the 2 % failure rate is for perfect use. To achieve more protection than typical use is not difficult, because typical use includes not always using condoms, penetration before the condom is put on and not doing anything is the condom breaks or...
  8. R

    Safe Sex - Standards, Practices, Information & Resources

    Harm? Other than your insurance company may not pay for it, none that I'm aware. Help? Maybe. From all the research I've done, the HPV test is not all telling. It's possible that you've had a strain and naturally cleared it long before you took the test. Remember, many HPV infections go...
  9. R

    Finding a new relationship discreetly

    I've had very good luck with Okcupid. It's certainly possible to make a profile that will attract people without it being obvious that it's you. I've seen a lot of poly people with profiles that didn't include a picture or had pictures without full faces. And you can be totally upfront about...
  10. R

    Same Time Next Year

    It has always been one of my favorite movies. Then again, Alan Alda is one of my favorite actors of all time.
  11. R

    Monogamy vs. Polyamory

    There's another thread that links to an article by the same author with the same set of ridiculous points. I also really want to know how polyamory is more expensive to society. Expensive in what sense? To whom? The larger the support network someone has, the less likely they will need...
  12. R

    New Lifestyle Emotions (NLE)

    Everything seems to be going far to easily and sometimes I wonder if there is another shoe to drop somewhere. If you read a lot of stuff on polyamory, it can give you the impression it has to be hard. It certainly can be hard, but I don't think it has to be.
  13. R

    Poly Math

    Pure propane has virtually no odor. Some thing with natural gas. It's added to make leaks super noticeable. And propane is perfectly safe, if handled correctly. Like poly relationships :).
  14. R

    Poly Math

    Mine's not math, but chemistry. Equally geeky, but in a different direction. I was thinking that lots of poly people use letters to describe their relationships (V or N or W). But there are a lot of configurations that just doesn't work for. So I had a flash of brilliance. Assume each...
  15. R

    HELP...STDs

    It's the difference between theoretical risk and actual risk, a distinction that many people chose not to see. The more partners you have, and the more partners your partner has, the more vectors there are for disease, theoretically. However, in my experience, poly people tend to be very...
  16. R

    Time

    I do schedules my dates with my boyfriend like I'm scheduling a business meeting, but somehow, I'm okay with it. And on the upside, scheduling it our time together a week in advance or more gives me something to look forward to when my week is less then splendid. I choose to look at the time I...
  17. R

    Why do some polys approach monos?

    When I was looking on okc to meet people to potentially date, I limited myself to people that either listed their relationship status as available or mentioned polyamory in their profile. I don't care whether someone is mono or poly, just so long as they really understand what poly is.
  18. R

    Primary/Secondary: Merged Threads, General Discussion / Debate

    I don't like the term boyfriend either, but maybe not for the same reason. I'm seeing someone new and I am grappling with to call him/think of him as. I don't like the terms primary, secondary, etc. Boyfriend doesn't seem right, but we haven't been seeing each other long enough for anything else.
  19. R

    Call out for survey participants :)

    I just did the survey. Good luck with it!
  20. R

    Calgary couple seeking advice

    To join in the chorus, I use okcupid, as well. As I'm still relatively new to polyamory, I've confined myself to people that list themselves as in a relationship, but available or that mention poly in their profile. I've found no shortage of people to talk to and have met two in person.
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