A Bittersweet Ending

Feileks

New member
A week ago today I ended a relationship with two people that I was seeing for about five months. There were definitely complications, but I at least thought there was a genuine friendship forming with them both. We would all spend time together every weekend doing all kinds of fun things. Then I found out that they both lied to me about something very serious, and to this day refuse to come clean, which is what hurts the most. I had asked them both if we were exclusive or not a couple months in. I made it clear that there was no pressure but just wanted to know where we were. They told me that they weren't interested in looking for other people while trying to see where things went with me, which was great news to hear. However, I was a little shocked since I was under the impression that we would take things very slow, especially because they both fear commitment. Fast forward a few months, during our holiday gift exchange, I decided to ask them how they felt about not looking for anyone else and if they felt like they wanted to see what else was out there. Then one of them looked me straight in the eyes and said that they had been looking the entire time but couldn't find anything. I was immediately taken off guard and hurt. I knew there were communication issues, but I didn't realize they were this bad, especially when the other partner disagreed on how the conversation of exclusivity went completely. I told them that I felt like he cheated by looking since I was told that he wouldn't be. They both didn't really see it that way and I was in so much shock that I just let it go.

After Christmas break was over, I decided to break up with them. They seemed fine with it and we agreed to be friends. No one asked me why I was done, and I didn't bother to go into explanation since no one seemed to care. Another week flies by of no chatting, but then one of them sends me messages throughout the day to update me about their life. I realize that I no longer want to talk with either of them anymore, and as much as I wanted to ghost, I didn't. I instead told her how I felt about everything. The talk went worse than I thought it would have. They denied that he admitted to looking for other people and told me that I had communication issues. It is true that I need to work on communication, but it was really shocking that they made it about me. It's been a week since I last talked to them and I am seriously so glad that it's over. I know how much worse things could have been if their true colors hadn't floated to the surface sooner. It's just a shame that something so silly and stupid ruined it all. It makes me sad that they couldn't be honest with me about anything, even though I was completely onboard with whatever from the beginning.
 
Last edited:
Hi Feileks,

I recently ended a relationship with a married who was in a poly relationship. The wife, husband and I had been friends for a long time. But it was when I started a relationship with the wife that my friendship with the husband started to go bad.

Simply, it came down to lack of communication. Mostly on his part. I made an effort to talk it out, whereas he avoided it.

I'm starting off my new year reflecting and looking ahead.

Look forward to reading more of your blogs :)
 

Feileks

New member
Hi Feileks,

I recently ended a relationship with a married who was in a poly relationship. The wife, husband and I had been friends for a long time. But it was when I started a relationship with the wife that my friendship with the husband started to go bad.

Simply, it came down to lack of communication. Mostly on his part. I made an effort to talk it out, whereas he avoided it.

I'm starting off my new year reflecting and looking ahead.

Look forward to reading more of your blogs :)

Wow, I am sorry to here this. But it does go to show you that there's only so much one person can do in any kind of relationship, whether it's a friendship or more. So, as disappointing as it may seem when someone doesn't do their part to keep things afloat, walking away knowing that you did all you could really helps in the process of moving on.

Thanks for stopping by!
 
Top