Do you LDR?

[SlowPoly]

Wondering how many folks here have a long term long distance relationship as part of their polycule. How long have you maintained that connection?

Mitch and I went from 3000 mile correspondence, to once-a-year LDR, then increasing visits, then to 100 mile not-so-LDR with every-two-weeks visits, to part-time nesting partners (and co-parents). That happened over about six years. (We had known each other 15-20 years before all that, but had normal, platonic, and rare "old flame" correspondence in the intervening years.)

How emotionally close do you feel to that person as opposed to someone you can connect with physically more frequently? Did that change for you when NRE wore off (if it did, or if you ever had some)?

I felt very emotionally close to Mitch during our LDR years, being more about words and shared ideas. He is generally more physical, and probably didn't feel the day-to-day emotional connection as much when we were apart. Neither of us treated it as a "primary" relationship, even though he didn't happen to have any other romantic or sexual partners in those years.

I feel like LDR made the NRE last super long - several years, really. We acknowledged that a lot of the heat between us was stoked by distance and the time limits on our visits. As part-time nesting partners and co-parents (which wasn't a goal from the beginning - kind of came about after my move created the shorter distance), we have converted to a different kind of emotional closeness. But I do wonder if our NRE would ever have ended, had we stayed very distant and only ever shared "honeymoons."

 

[vinsanity0]

Back to a nomadic life for me. I guess it is inevitable that I will have long distance relationships again.