having a baby with your secondary

[Norwegianpoly]

Obviously, it is a good idea to look into the legality of having kids with plural partners where you live. That goes for things in good times and bad, as well as when the kids become adults. Interesting to hear people talk about college money etc. Here, the state funds that (loans and scholarships), not the parents.

We were planning on having a kid with my husband/primary, doing the legal divorce/remarriage route and potentionally then having a kid with my boyfriend/other primary. Now my husband/ex left, so it looks like we will go through all that stuff for real but possably having a kid along the way. In my head we are still poly (and it could be the ex and I get back together as well).

 

[Ravenscroft]

Looking back, I guess some of us were tripped up by the

has anyone else out there had children with their secondary? And what issues did you have?

part in the very first post.

I was trying to over look the negative stuff that seemed negative just because we were not mono.

Very few people risk being separated from their kids because they're monogamous.

Belittling people for "being negative" -- especially after ASKING about "issues" -- is absurd. Sorta "pot <-> kettle."

Wouldn't it have been MUCH more efficient to just have started off by saying "Hi, this is us, we're all really smart & well-intentioned people, & here's what we're gonna do, so tell us we're super-special for doing it!!" & subsequently everyone could just have agreed?? Nothing wrong with simply ASKING a bunch of imaginary strangers for attaboys, certainly.