hello from a hesitant polyam in Kentucky

[mrd6582]

Just when was Aries supposed to have time for the rest of his life, home/yard/auto maintenance, seeing platonic friends and family, practicing hobbies, doing laundry and grocery shopping, while also working full time?

I feel this in my soul.

 

[IndieSolo]

I don't want to create or foster unrealistic expectations (such is the dilemma, I suppose) but at the beginning of a relationship I think it's fair to give a little more, giving things a chance to develop, understanding you can settle into a more practical schedule after a little while.

Hmm.

I guess I see the beginning of a new relationship in pretty much the opposite way. Even if I am thrilled and totally gaga to be with them, I let someone know right away if I need to move slowly and take my time to get to know them before settling into a regular routine. And if going at my slower pace is off-putting and makes them want to bail, then maybe it's for the best that they opt out early on. "Buh-bye!" I'd rather see how patient and willing they are to meet me where I need to be, rather than letting myself get sucked into a swirling miasma of expectations and obligations from which I later need to delicately (or abruptly) extricate myself.