How should I handle the several admirers that I have in college at the moment?

M

MikaelM

New member
I am 20 years old. I started college this summer. I have known for some time that I am viewed as extremely attractive by girls. I am about 6'7, I do strength training very often and have become very big and muscular from that, and I often hear from girls that I have a gorgeous face.

For this reason, I have had girls flirt with me quite aggressively since I started school, and it has become quite common for me to sleep with different girls quite regularly.

However, I sometimes feel like I might go overboard: there have been several situations when I have had sex with several different girls on separate occasions on the same day. This was, of course, extremely exhilarating for a few months, and I certainly enjoyed it. However, I am starting to feel that it is a bit difficult to do these activities while at the same time studying. But it is also very hard to resist all of the opportunities, since there are always some girls who try to call me and things like that.

For this reason, I have started considering some form of polyamorous meetings with these girls, where I have sex with several of them simultaneously, since this would make it easier for me to meet them without spending unreasonable amounts of time on it. I do love getting intimate with them, and I think all the girls are very attractive in their own ways, but I am not quite sure how I should tell them about it in the best way.
 
The reality is that many of the young women having sex with you are likely doing so because they have low self esteem and think they'll get love and attention by having recreational sex with you. Maybe you'll pick them as a girlfriend.

As a guy, you should be so much more careful about having random sex with women because you can't screen them effectively enough to know if they're doing it for the right reasons. You don't know them well enough to know if their yes is a real yes, or if they're freezing with fear and want you to stop but can't say. You're not old or mature enough yourself to understand these subtle nuances.

That makes you vulnerable to violating someone because you didn't realise, as well as the rarer event of someone falsely accusing you of violating them. You'll have absolutely no proof that you didnt. It will be your word against theirs. And if it doesn't destroy your criminal record, it will destroy your reputation.

Creating a situation where young women feel pressured into group activity is a fine way to increase your chances of that.

What I would do is focus on building healthy monogamous relationships with women at the moment. Learn how to cook and clean and look after a home. Learn to adult. Learn to have one girlfriend you treat respectfully and cherish her autonomy. Learn to be sexually skilled and actually please a woman.

Later on, in your late 20s or 30s, when you're sure you're not a typical straight guy who can't give a cis woman orgasms and can't clean a house, then consider if you'd be a positive and loving partner for more than one person.
 
MikaelM said:
For this reason, I have started considering some form of polyamorous meetings with these girls, where I have sex with several of them simultaneously, since this would make it easier for me to meet them without spending unreasonable amounts of time on it.
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This is not a "polyamorous meeting". Do you love "these girls"? Group sex does not equal polyamory. I hope you're using condoms, and if you do have group sex with these women, you need to change your condom each time your penis changes vaginas.

The above assumes that this story is true and not a troll bait post.
 
Hello MikaelM,
I have to say I am quite jealous. I wish I had multiple admirers, if one must have a dilemma, that's a good one to have.

It seems to me that you should strike up a healthy balance. Don't give girls up altogether, but take some time out now and then to tend to your studies. Having sex with several of them simultaneously would be one way to approach this problem. Just tell them, "I would like to have sex with several of you simultaneously, I think that would be quite exciting."

Hopefully that helps,
Kevin T.
 
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