I kinda screwed up Christmas

L

lisa6

New member
Hi

Husband and I are in a triad for 2 and 1/2 yrs with my BFF.. I made plans to go away over the holidays... we usually spend Christmas Day with girlfriend.. however when I booked plane tickets for the Holiday I accidentally booked tickets for an alternative date that the website gave me which turns out to be Christmas Day..

Part of me just wants to keep the tickets. Part of me says scrap them and buy new tickets.. it would cost an extra few hundred dollars to change the dates so that we can leave a day or two after Christmas..

We did invite and offer to pay for girlfriend to join us on vacation over New Years she already has plans to babysit grandchild..

She has let us know she is sad about Christmas.
 
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I would change. Or offer to change and see what the response was. It’s so power-imbalanced to be in a triad appropriate prioritization is crucial.

What would you do if you accidentally booked you on one day and your hubby on the other so you missed Xmas together? (Assume you would not know if your girlfriend was free or not to spend time with one of you.)
. If you would change for that, you should change for her.

Owning a mistake is a good idea, even if it costs
Something.
 
Hi!

Thankyou so much!

I really in my heart of hearts feel badly.. I don't like to disappoint anyone especially those I love...

I will have to go over it with the hubby.. I think it is feasible to change our tickets but we have 6 kids going with us can't change all those tickets! If he doesn't mind maybe I will change his ticket or both his and mine and not the kids.. our oldest is 21 and can be in charge of the the other 5 for a night..

Our big celebration is Christmas Eve so I don't mind be separated from the kids Christmas Day.. I would have to see how he feels about it..

I think in the end girlfriend would say don't do that but I will ask both of them.

I did apologize to her and won't make that mistake next year..

It really was an honest mistake..
 
Thinking about it some more...

I will ask him if it's ok if I fly him out the day after Christmas and I will go be with the kids Christmas Day! He can go spend Christmas Day with our girlfriend .. and I will look after the kids.. a couple kids don't have tickets yet and he can fly out with them the day after Christmas and she can drive them all to the airport.

I think that is the most feasible plan. 😋
 
IF there’s are kids involved, that does change it a bit- how old are they? Kids rally havr to be prioritized. In my relationships, the only hierarchy we
Have ideally is the kids come first. How would they feel about the missing day?

It might mean a lot to your GF to hear “I would absolutely change it for yoiC can I’m debating because of the kids and need to find out what they think first.
 
If they are your kids though, and not his, they might love the extra time,’or they might not mind anyways.
 
Hi lisa6,

I like your idea of flying him out the day after Christmas, and you go be with the kids on Christmas Day. I am sure your BFF will understand, it was an honest mistake.

Regards,
Kevin T.
 
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