PumpkinKing93
New member
Hello All!
Im actually quite and anxious to write this post as I am still trying to figure out what it is and what I want, but here goes nothing.
Im 24, a cis gendered gay male. I have been with my partner in a long distance relationship for the past 6 years. We lived together for a year but parted ways when I went back home for Grad school, still maintaining our relationship long distance. He is my first love, and first relationship with a male.
There is many other factors that contribute to me joining and thinking about all this but thats probably for a personal post later on.
In the past couple of weeks I have been thinking more and more about talking to my partner about possibility opening the relationship to include other people when I move back to be with him after grad school. Our relationship isnt perfect, it has ups and down, but I honestly cant see life without him. He knows the deepest parts of me and still loves me for who I am. He truly is my best friend, my rock, and everything. However, I am aware that he will not meet all the needs that I need of as a person, and I wont be able to meet all of his needs. Im not sure if I would be okay with him getting other needs met from others but want him to be happy. I would want him to be my primary partner. I have found myself more open to loving more than one person. When we first started dating, I was extremely self conscious and had very low self esteem that I was easily jealous. However through my own work and therapy, i've learned to see where my insecurities stem from.
Being conditioned to see the world of relationship as monogamous, I cant help but feel terrible that these thoughts are going through my mind and i'm considering this. I cant help but feel like a terrible partner, but am also trying to remember that sexuality is fluid and changes over time.
I guess to end this post and not make it so long. Im just here to learn and educate myself on this topic and see if it is really something I want to do, and if it is, how do i talk and manage this difficult talk with a partner who may not be okay with it.
Thanks for reading this, and looking forward to hearing and learning from you all.
Im actually quite and anxious to write this post as I am still trying to figure out what it is and what I want, but here goes nothing.
Im 24, a cis gendered gay male. I have been with my partner in a long distance relationship for the past 6 years. We lived together for a year but parted ways when I went back home for Grad school, still maintaining our relationship long distance. He is my first love, and first relationship with a male.
There is many other factors that contribute to me joining and thinking about all this but thats probably for a personal post later on.
In the past couple of weeks I have been thinking more and more about talking to my partner about possibility opening the relationship to include other people when I move back to be with him after grad school. Our relationship isnt perfect, it has ups and down, but I honestly cant see life without him. He knows the deepest parts of me and still loves me for who I am. He truly is my best friend, my rock, and everything. However, I am aware that he will not meet all the needs that I need of as a person, and I wont be able to meet all of his needs. Im not sure if I would be okay with him getting other needs met from others but want him to be happy. I would want him to be my primary partner. I have found myself more open to loving more than one person. When we first started dating, I was extremely self conscious and had very low self esteem that I was easily jealous. However through my own work and therapy, i've learned to see where my insecurities stem from.
Being conditioned to see the world of relationship as monogamous, I cant help but feel terrible that these thoughts are going through my mind and i'm considering this. I cant help but feel like a terrible partner, but am also trying to remember that sexuality is fluid and changes over time.
I guess to end this post and not make it so long. Im just here to learn and educate myself on this topic and see if it is really something I want to do, and if it is, how do i talk and manage this difficult talk with a partner who may not be okay with it.
Thanks for reading this, and looking forward to hearing and learning from you all.
