Relationship downsizing


New member
Norwegianpoly, I am so glad you came back to answer and update us about where you and your bf are at on your journey. It's clear you've both been communicating fairly well about the issues concerned.

I'd love for you to stay in touch, if only for the selfish reason that I am in a similar LDR boat (sans the kid issue) and looking to move countries at some point over the next couple of years to be with my lovers, and potentially legally marry J.


New member
I will stay in touch. Best of luck with your plans to marry and close the distance :)

I have noticed one thing recently, and that is that he is turning slightly more jealous since we became a mono couple. He is not super jealous, and has apparently zero worries over the distance and my male friends. But in person he is growing jealous of me with his male friends, even the happily married ones. He is not making scenes or anything, but he makes jokes that seem to have a seed of truth in them (some of his friends came on to me in the past). He will go: "She is mine, you can't have her" and stuff like that.

I wonder if he feels that there is a lot on stake for him in this period between me settling the divorce and the uppertunity for us to get married? I get a sense that he would feel relieved if my divorce was finalized and we opted for a fiance visa or something similar. But that will take time.

As of now, I take his newfound jealousy as to come from a place of best intentions. Maybe he is worried that he could loose me during this time and feels out of control? I know that is when my own jealousy could be triggered.