Skadi's matrix


New member
After much consideration, and hinting from some friends (looking at you Cleo), I decided to write here.

Where do I start? Well, Skadi... That is I.
Am from a quaint little country the Netherlands, where poly is funnily enough very much accepted. My coming out many years ago to my friends and family was more odd for me than for them. My non-monogamous journey started in my teens, where feeling like an alien in a bowl of mono people was the norm. It felt so unnatural to me to just love one person and be committed to them, while all my friends were coupled up like a Twin Pole ice lollies and clinged to their significant other. How suffocating I thought. Nope, never for me (laugh).

The very first person I told was Arantxa when I was 14, who is still one of my closest allies til today. While she is as mono and vanilla as they come, she was very welcoming and understanding of my non-mono adventure, as we were from quite a "religious" municipality for my country's standards back then. But if I wasn't mono, what was I then? So many questions and no info, and the quest began.

Until my 21st I had "mono relationships" with a big layer of sweet, whipped ENM on top of it, but it didn't fit me at all. One relationship was so detrimental to my mental health, I basically fell off the face of the earth and lived like a monk after that (not really, but you get the gist). In those quiet years that were following I found out about polyamory like Einstein found out Theory of Relativity, and the lightbulb went off!

A move abroad and I alight Gem and Leo, both also poly noobs, but nonetheless very adequate and we started a flourishing interdependent RA-style triad-ish with a KTP model whilst not knowing what a KTP model was. How lucky was I to face one of the hardest dynamics like a walk in the park? (Laugh again). It's actually not until recently and reading a lot about poly that we came to the conclusion how very blessed we were on how we started. Gem who is a bit on the dreamy side said that maybe it was better not knowing how it all was suppose to structure and let nature do its work. Hmmm, no lady, I think we were just very lucky.

I'm a bit skint with time today, so will have to end it here a bit abrupt. Will write once more when time allows.

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