When I was in my 20's I was in a series of poly relationships with men and women. It was glorious and I felt powerful and fufilled. I them met my partner. He was amazing and I fell for him in a way that I have never fell for anyone else. He is still my partner after almost 20 years.
The past few years we have talked about opening up our relationship after all this time. In the midst of a mid life crisis my husband found a person to date. From day one I did not like how she treated him. She treated him as a penis to be used and she developed more of a relationship with me. He fretted about having nothing to say to her constantly which made me insane.
MY #1 BIG rule was no sex without a condom. Problem...my partner cannot perform with a condom. So the first time he slept with someone else he did not wear a condom. This was with a person I knew was having anonymous encounters and many many partners. I flipped. I could not take it.
My partner was tested for STD's and was negative. His AIDS test will not be valid until June. For now we are in a holding pattern. I asked him not to see this woman again. every time we talk it goes no where. He yells well you just hated her anyway......so I bet your glad this is where we are. He will not have any sexual contact with me at all and before this we enjoyed a very healthy sexual relationship.
Where I am at is hard. I know I can be poly and I have done so in the past. I am not sure I can be poly with him. every time I lament that we are not having sex he declares go date and I think this is not how it is supposed to be.
I adore this person. We have children together and this has to be the worst thing he has done in the course of our relationship. Our kids have special needs and he works long hours. Him dating is going to be very hard on me especially if he falls in love.
I have had a few dates. Nothing serious and I am very ok with taking this very slow for myself.
I want to be poly but I am not sure I want to have an open relationship with someone who willfully ignored my boundaries in such a nasty way.
I have been reading here and everything I read makes sense. I am mourning the end of my relationship as I know it... It is hard.......I hope to find the sunshine on the other side
The past few years we have talked about opening up our relationship after all this time. In the midst of a mid life crisis my husband found a person to date. From day one I did not like how she treated him. She treated him as a penis to be used and she developed more of a relationship with me. He fretted about having nothing to say to her constantly which made me insane.
MY #1 BIG rule was no sex without a condom. Problem...my partner cannot perform with a condom. So the first time he slept with someone else he did not wear a condom. This was with a person I knew was having anonymous encounters and many many partners. I flipped. I could not take it.
My partner was tested for STD's and was negative. His AIDS test will not be valid until June. For now we are in a holding pattern. I asked him not to see this woman again. every time we talk it goes no where. He yells well you just hated her anyway......so I bet your glad this is where we are. He will not have any sexual contact with me at all and before this we enjoyed a very healthy sexual relationship.
Where I am at is hard. I know I can be poly and I have done so in the past. I am not sure I can be poly with him. every time I lament that we are not having sex he declares go date and I think this is not how it is supposed to be.
I adore this person. We have children together and this has to be the worst thing he has done in the course of our relationship. Our kids have special needs and he works long hours. Him dating is going to be very hard on me especially if he falls in love.
I have had a few dates. Nothing serious and I am very ok with taking this very slow for myself.
I want to be poly but I am not sure I want to have an open relationship with someone who willfully ignored my boundaries in such a nasty way.
I have been reading here and everything I read makes sense. I am mourning the end of my relationship as I know it... It is hard.......I hope to find the sunshine on the other side