Desperately seeking guidance (open to all to help please)

MZTERY said:
Why do I put up with it with the whole bedroom situation? Well, I have because it is the only way I have personal time with him.
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You are being a doormat. The other "girls" are too, by the sound of it. The fact that you don't understand that you are just being a doormat doesn't change the fact that this dude is wiping his boots off on you whenever he feels like it.

MZTERY said:
Our kids were never planned at all. They happened naturally as a blessing from God.
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This just gets more and more weird with every new layer of information.

nycindie said:
She was a smart woman, successful, together, and she became a wreck and a recluse, and a child died because she let Joel Steinberg run her life.
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I get what you're puttin' down, NYCindie, but I'm going to go way out on a limb here and say that this is not a transformation-type of situation with the OP.
 
Why in Hades would you put yourself in this situation?

This man sounds like the type looking to build his own frigging cult.
 
I missed this the first go-round:

Quote:
Originally Posted by MZTERY:
Our kids were never planned at all. They happened naturally as a blessing from God.
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No, they happened "naturally" because you fucked without birth control and a sperm fertilized an egg.
 
Dagferi said:
Why in Hades would you put yourself into this situation?

This man sounds like the type looking to build his own frigging cult.
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And he appears to be succeeding!
 
Yes BoringMan, I naturally got pregnant like the way most teenagers do... without thought, without condoms, just that young love! But regardless, with love they were made, and they are not fuck trophies for either of us.
 
I really appreciate all of your help on this topic everyone! You guys really touch on every thing that I put out here, and dissect it well to get your points across. That is truly a relief.

NYCindie, I actually read about the woman you mentioned earlier and my situation is nowhere near that severe. He does not hurt me or the kids like that, at all. But I do see where you were going with it and I appreciate it.

Someone mentioned forced pregnancy. He is not forcing them to have his kids. I think he makes himself obligated to have their kids.
 
Speaking of religion, you all don't seem to be some of those Fundamentalist Latter Day Saints, and you're not Hebrews from 700 BCE. You got sold a bill of goods, tempted by him bringing in women for you to have sex with. But of course, there's no chemistry between the women (you're all women, not girls, I hope)-- you're all just his chattel. He's sick, he's got a sick fetish that dehumanizes all of you-- you're all replaceable, he wants to pass his "strong" genes down, he doesn't want to be an involved father, he wants to be a pimp!!!

Get out now! Good gods, this is awful. This is not polyamory.
 
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Magdlyn said:
Get out now! Good gods, this is awful. This is not polyamory.
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This topic seems a lot like discussing the wallpaper choices of a building which is engulfed in flames.
 
MZTERY, take my words with a grain of salt, but honestly, you don't sound happy in this dynamic. Everyone deserves to be happy. Whatever it takes for you to be able find the happiness, I hope you do, because the only substitute for being able to do the things you love with the people you choose to love, is situations that at least make you smile, or induce involuntary laughter, even at the most inappropriate times. I know you are intelligent enough to let bitter advice roll right out the other ear. Which is why I know you will find a way to leave your situation if you really know you must, even if the entire world tells you no. The world is chockful of people who use intimidation, humiliation and condescension in an attempt to make you feel less then, when the truth is you are so much greater than the lowest common denominator that employs those tactics.
 
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typos but too late to edit

was not OK for me to write words that would would need to be moderated, I am thankful that was the only action taken, when a mod has to step in, there is no justification for writing what needed to be removed, I should know better than to choose those words.

If I intentionally walk that close to the line where the rules separate right from wrong, it is always my fault for every step taken that goes over, even accidentally
 
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Natja said:
What was this thread about again?
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It's about a lady who lives with her two kids, their sperm donor, and two or three other young vaginae-uteri and the Man can't wait until the two existing Gifts-from-god are self-supporting so that he can travel around the globe spreading his seed.

Does that bring you up to speed at all?
 
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BoringGuy said:
It's about a lady who lives with her two kids, their sperm donor, and two or three other young vaginae-uteri and the Man can't wait until the two existing Gifts-from-god are self-supporting so that he can travel around the globe spreading his seed.

Does that bring you up to speed at all?
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Now say that again, this time to the tune of The Brady Bunch...
 
Dirtclustit said:
Honestly, you don't sound happy in this dynamic. Everyone deserves to be happy. Whatever that takes for you to be able find the happiness, I hope you do, because the only substitute for being able to do the things you love with the people you choose to love, is situations that at least make you smile, or induce involuntary laughter, even at the most inappropriate times. I know you are intelligent enough to let bitter advice roll right out the other ear. Which is why I know you will find a way to leave your situation if you really know you must, even if the entire world tells you no. The world is chockful of people who use intimidation, humiliation and condescension in an attempt to make you feel less then, when the truth is you are so much greater than the lowest common denominator that employs those tactics,
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Thank you for your post. I really appreciate your insight and advice.

I know my situation seemed humorous to some here, which I don't take offensive at, because I believe everyone has a "funny" story here, but I am glad I put it out there and got the feedback that I did from each and every single one of you. It has really helped me look at myself and my situation in a different light and understand how to make it work a little better for ourselves, because we do care for one another and have love for each other, regardless of whatever! That I know for sure.

All of your comments and thoughts made me reflect more on the positive end of us, rather than the BS that my emotions only allow me to see. Certain comments here made me think, "No, that's not how it is," or, "No, that's not right."

So, I will work on my relationship better with each of my partners, rather than focus on the one. Hopefully my next topic will be more optimistic... and soon!! :)
 
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