polyandrous
New member
have any of you successfully been in a relationship with two members of the same family? or at least tried it? say, two cousins, two sisters, etc, etc.
odd triad?
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Keep in mind that in a triad (as opposed to a V), all the members are intimate. So what you are talking about would mean the two family members would also be in a relationship (which in many cases is incest, unless they're not closely enough related).
Now that doesn't mean people have no experience with such a situation, but I would say it's probably rarer.
On the other hand if you mean a V where one person dates two people from the same family, who aren't involved with each other, then that would be more common. I'm not sure if anyone here is currently in such a situation though.
polyandrous
New member
I haven't been in such a situation, but there's a really good movie about a lady who becomes intimate with two brothers: "December Bride" (1990). You might want to check it out if you haven't seen it.
I knew a lady on another poly forum who was intimate with two twin brothers. But it's been a long time since I heard from her; I don't remember her username or anything. It sounded like the three of them got along really well though.
I knew a lady on another poly forum who was intimate with two twin brothers. But it's been a long time since I heard from her; I don't remember her username or anything. It sounded like the three of them got along really well though.
polyandrous
New member
thanks! i will check it out.
In my early twenties, I was in two triads involving one pair of identical twins. In other words, I was sleeping with both twin brothers as well as both of their girlfriends. I was rather a "secondary" in both relationships (we didn't have the terminology back then.) I'm not sure I can offer you much advice. I was very young, and we were definitely "winging it."
One of the twin's girlfriends slept with both the brothers, too. Now, they've been married for fifteen years, and her former (I'm guessing) lover is her brother-in-law. I'm only Facebook friends with all of them now, so I'm not sure how long the sexual relationship continued into their relationship/marriage after I bowed out. I was with them nearly two years.
One of the twin's girlfriends slept with both the brothers, too. Now, they've been married for fifteen years, and her former (I'm guessing) lover is her brother-in-law. I'm only Facebook friends with all of them now, so I'm not sure how long the sexual relationship continued into their relationship/marriage after I bowed out. I was with them nearly two years.
I'm now married to the woman my brother has been dating since I was 11 and I'm 27 now. It's a bigger deal to folks looking in than us. Ari had issues with it in the beginning. The oddest questions come from people who are fixated on the sexual relationships. There's no incest, threesomes, or any freaky deaky stuff popping off. It's not that kinda party. All I know about their sex life is anything they do is protected. They chose not to have kids together and she isn't down with him fathering or even being a father figure to kids we have. He's gonna be an uncle and that's it. No nephew-son or niece-daughter ties are gonna be going on over here.
polyandrous
New member
Thanks for all the replies! a couple more questions: what were the biggest misgivings you guys personally had about it, and how long did it take for that to go away?
sorry for the quizzing -- im in a weird situation involving siblings. one is mono and the other is polyflexible
sorry for the quizzing -- im in a weird situation involving siblings. one is mono and the other is polyflexible
Inyourendo
New member
there's someone on here he was married to her brother's girlfriend
Re (from polyandrous):
I think every person is very different from all other people. Even identical twins turn out to be not so identical as they go about their individual lives. The saying I've heard is, "First year forming, second year storming, third year norming." That's probably true in many cases, but whether it's a year, or more, or less, who knows? It depends on the unique people in the relationship. And there's probably not a special rule you can depend on for siblings. I have siblings who are as different from each other as night is from day.
This is a good thing. It makes life less predictable, but it also makes life more interesting.
I am in a V and we all had lots of misgivings in the early years. I think our biggest misgiving was the fear of getting "kicked to the curb." I'd say it roughly took us three years to learn that we were safe with each other, and wouldn't end up alone.
I think every person is very different from all other people. Even identical twins turn out to be not so identical as they go about their individual lives. The saying I've heard is, "First year forming, second year storming, third year norming." That's probably true in many cases, but whether it's a year, or more, or less, who knows? It depends on the unique people in the relationship. And there's probably not a special rule you can depend on for siblings. I have siblings who are as different from each other as night is from day.
This is a good thing. It makes life less predictable, but it also makes life more interesting.
I am in a V and we all had lots of misgivings in the early years. I think our biggest misgiving was the fear of getting "kicked to the curb." I'd say it roughly took us three years to learn that we were safe with each other, and wouldn't end up alone.
polyandrous
New member
this is the problem into which i keep running with the monogamous party in this sitch; i can give as many assurances as i can, but i think unless he finally consents to opening up and realizes that what i'm saying is true, he may not ever believe me
Well don't be too quick to give up hope. Sometimes people gradually grow to trust and believe after the passing of time and the growing proof of your promises to them. Given a few (several?) years with you, the monogamous party you struggle with today may come to feel much more comfortable with you about the whole thing. Not saying that's guaranteed, but I think it very often happens that way.
polyandrous
New member
hope is still abundant. when i first introduced the idea of poly to him, i didnt go about it well, and sort of took an 'all or nothing' attitude toward it. i did back off and we went almost a year without talking about it. now that i've softly broached the subject again, he's more receptive to discussing it and even laying out hypothetical dynamics/boundaries/situations.